How's this for a lead: "An Australian immigrant with a penis fetish is terrorising the Waitemata Harbour."
Har har, since it's rather misleading...
The story is about a student named Jeremy Barker who is studying the barnacle as part of his master's program. He says that, in the course of his research in the harbor, he's discovered multiple oysters with barnacle penises in their stomachs.
AUT University student Jeremy Barker says the unusual looking fish targets the barnacle’s phallic appendages.
And he wants to know why.
"We have found a large number of penises inside their stomachs," he says.
"It’s not killing the barnacles but it will stop the next generation being produced."
We're 100% supportive of science but, Jeremy, we'd rather you didn't find out why the fish are targeting dicks. We already have enough nightmares about castration thanks to that one ex-girlfriend...
Read the full story here, via Stuff.co.nz
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