Women want "rich husbands, not careers" claims study
By Kelly BourdetJanuary 4th, 2011, 6:30 pmComments (15)
A new study published by the Centre for Policy Studies think tank claims that the desire for gender equality is largely a myth. The U.K. study suggests that women prefer to "marry up" instead of supporting themselves. Data from a 1949 British study — in which 20 percent of women married a man of a higher education level than themselves — was compared with new data in which 38 percent of women had decided to "marry up."
I'm skeptical of these findings for many reasons. The article references women's "aspirations" to marry a man of wealth and stature, but what effect does this hypothetical desire have on their actual life decisions? If someone in a study asked you, "Do you want to marry some baller dude?" my bet is you would say yes.
The study can also be construed as a statement on men "marrying down" and could speak more to the desire of men to preserve traditional gender roles by seeking out women who are not career-driven. It may, in fact, be the case that there are plenty of career-oriented women looking to provide for themselves and to marry an "equal," but that some men are threatened by their success.
Also, traditional marriage is less common now than in 1949, so the data is skewed by the fact that the participants wanted to marry in the first place. And it's heteronormative. So, in closing, I'm not arguing that some women don't want to marry a sugar daddy and buy a mink and quit their shitty job, but I am arguing that this study is bullshit and doesn't prove anything.
Later y'all, I need to get ready for my date with another age-inappropriate Goldman Sachs dude.
Commentarium (15 Comments)
what about men who want rich wives and no career? (i'm interested)
This finding is directly contradicted by a number of American studies showing that many more women are "marrying equal". The upshot of U.S. studies is that the 1950s model of a woman going to college to get her "Mrs." degree - that is, finding some eventual doctor or lawyer to marry - has been supplanted by women going to college to get a real degree and a real career.
One consequence of this trend is the increasing socioeconomic stratification in the U.S. The Mrs. degree was a way for lower status women to "marry up" (in the jargon, it created "socio-economic mixing"). It appears that now men from richer backgrounds with higher-end career goals are marrying women who also come from richer, career-oriented families, so there is less socio-economic mixing. The rich marry the rich and the rest of us are stuck with each other.
Census numbers show that 75% of married men earn more than their wives.
Most women still do the Mrs. Degree thing (nursing, elem ed) in their early 20's and then marry-up in their late 20's. The women you are speaking of are a small demographic.
I think it's odd that women think marrying someone less ambitious is bad, whereas men are generally willing to marry a woman who is not as ambitious. Women are the more selective gender.
Nope....most women, actually, almost every woman, I know want careers of their own including myself.
"[...]but that some men are threatened by their success."
I hear/read this every now and then and can't help but wonder:
1. Is this an American thing?
2. Is it an urban myth?
3. Does it occur only amongst the kind of men I avoid anyway?
Neither I nor any of my male friends even understand the concept of being threatened by a partners success, regardless of gender. What kind of deranged narcissist worries about these things?
Most men are not threatened. That is just a myth that women tell other women so they can justify rejecting men who are of lower socioeconomic status.
Women marry-up. Men do not. Since women are the dominant gender on college campuses, it will only become more challenging for them to marry-up.
I do not feel sorry for them. They will either do what men have done since our creation -which is to marry-up -- or they will die single and childless.
@someone
I don't think it's an American thing, or an urban myth, but it does happen. For the same reason that some taller women won't date men who are shorter, the way others perceive our relationships matter and can have a chilling effect on who and how we date.
I do like that the findings in this study are based on the assumption that more education directly correlates to wealth. I also have to say, the guys I knew in law school had a harder time of finding attractive, available women or the same educational background to date than in undergrad. More of my female classmates were already married by the time we got to law school, and more of the ones who weren't were engaged by graduation.
As a 20-something woman just out of college, I've found it difficult to find guys my age who are as ambitious and career driven as I am. Women make up at least 50% of undergrads, if not more, and this leads me to believe that when women say that want a rich husband, what they really mean is that they want a man who has the kind of ambition that leads to financial security. I wouldn't mind supporting my future husband if he was pursuing a career he was truly passionate about, but he's just gonna lay on the couch all day while I'm making the money, that isn't gonna fly. Marrying some oil tycoon's son would be awesome, but not as awesome as a guy who makes his money through hard work.
So if you are earning 75k and marry a man earning 30k, how will the combined income not give you financial security?
Methinks your standards are too high. Try marrying-down. Men do it all the time. Men don't worry about marrying their financial equal. Stop letting hypergamy limit viable options that exist.
@Someone: I'm a woman and I can tell you that I have had men with whom I had burgeoning romances tell me, directly to my face, that they found my intelligence "intimidating" (usually just before we stopped seeing each other). So I wouldn't find it the least bit dubious that your average guy is "intimidated" by a woman who is more successful than he. Or, in fact, more ANYTHING than he. But I'm glad to hear that you and your friends buck that trend.
@thinkeywritey: That is incredibly galling to those of us guys who have trouble finding exactly that kind of woman. Gah. WTF is it? Double-Y-chromosome...? ...testosterone poisoning...? I fear for the future.
@MW I don't know, but if you can tell me where more of your sort is, I'll gladly leave Michigan. (Don't mistake this as a Michigan-bashing comment; there are plenty of awesome people here, which is why I'm still here. On the other hand, I'm also still single.)
@ricky: i wonder, too!
In other news: Cake makes you fat.
Do you know why men don't want to marry "career women"? Because they prefer to marry younger women than themselves. Young career women are too focused on their careers to want to get married.