Sesame Street says Bert and Ernie aren't gay, just "best friends"

Speculation has swirled for years that Bert and Ernie are more than just friends, but the good folks over at Sesame Street have always kept mum on the issue. Thanks to the petition that's been making the rounds on the internet pushing for the puppets to get married, the show has finally broken its silence to tell the world that Bert and Ernie are not, repeat not, gay.

However, they're not exactly straight, either. Here's the show's official statement on the matter: 

"Bert and Ernie are best friends. They were created to teach preschoolers that people can be good friends with those who are very different from themselves.

Even though they are identified as male characters and possess many human traits and characteristics (as most Sesame Street Muppets do), they remain puppets, and do not have a sexual orientation."

Well, there you have it I guess. I don't think I'm alone in my choice to ignore this statement entirely and continue to fondly think of the pair as an adorable, cranky old gay couple.