Dating Confessions by You "The phrase 'just friends' drives me nuts because to me, friendship feels like a deeper connection than a romantic relationship usually does."
What has being a gay-rights activist taught you about dating?
That some people are just not into you, and you have to deal with that.
How would revoking Prop 8 improve dating?
I'm not sure it would. But maybe, just maybe — if everyone was allowed to marry whom they wanted, gay people would at least try to be more romantic. If they can get married, they might have more reason to be romantic. If someone has the prospect of marriage on their mind, they might be more likely to go down that track. If they don't have that option, what's the point?
What makes protests good dates?
You learn a lot about someone when you people-watch with them, and protests are a great place to do that. Plus, there are a lot of funny moments you can share, especially when you in a crowd of mostly gay men. First of all, the entire protest looks like a fucking H&M ad — everyone is dressed so crisp and clean, and then we're doing this march on
promotion
Third Street and I was really worried we were gonna lose the entire march when we passed the Abercrombie store. The best was passing some Yes on 8 protesters — and this one guy with a lisp was like, "You know what, just go fuck yourself!" They're just great moments to share with someone special.
How do you tell someone they need to trim their pubes?
For guys with long pubes, just say something to the effect of, "I heard that trimming your pubes makes your dick look bigger." You'll see how fast they'll start man-scaping.
My girlfriend likes to playfully choke me, and I'm scared it will go to far. How should I bring it up? Or should I?
Why are people so afraid to say what they actually mean? A good, "Don't choke me, bitch!" would suffice. Some things are an issue that you need to sit down about. This is not one of them.
My boyfriend is obsessed with trying new positions in bed to the point where sex really isn't enjoyable. How can I get him to understand that the crazy positions are neither comfortable nor pleasurable? I just want to have regular sex again.
Scream louder during missionary, and let him know that this Kama Sutra shit is not cutting it. If you're comfortable enough to try the reverse triple-X bullshit — not that I have anything against people who do that — but if you're comfortable enough to try it, you're definitely comfortable enough to have a conversation. I'm not going to bend over a fucking couch for a half an hour.
I'm always too shy to reveal my emotions to a guy, and then they think I'm not interested. What can I do?
Flirting never hurts. You can flirt without revealing too much of yourself, and still remain interested. When I'm at work, I flirt all the time. Just making jokes, like, this girl checked out a library book, and I was like, "That will be fifty dollars." And she was like, "What?!" And I said, "I'm just kidding," and you know what? She walked out of the library with a smile on her face. Say something unexpected and say just kidding, that always works.
I want to smoke after sex, and I don't want the guy to judge me. What should I do?
My first instinct is to say, "Don't smoke." But maybe you could walk towards your window and smoke there while the guy lies in bed recovering. I'm sure he won't mind the view he's getting.
Jon, 21
Why are Prop 8 protesters better in bed?
They're passionate for all the right reasons.
How do you seduce a Prop 8 protester?
Use a protest chant, then open up to them about your story of being harassed by anti-gay activists. Then sympathetic cuddling may lead to more...
What has being a gay-rights activist taught you about dating?
Being politically active is definitely sexy, and can lead you to a new network of like-minded people for friendship and more.
What makes protests good dates?
It brings the passion and those positive emotions from people, not to mention plenty of opportunities to cheer, hug and kiss.
I'm always too shy to reveal my emotions to a guy, and then they think I'm not interested. What can I do?
I would do something out of the box. Nothing verbal or face-to-face. Send a cutesy note like in high school: "Do you like me? Check yes or no." If there's something you have in common, you can hint that you like the person through a different kind of medium. Like with the guy I like right now, we have a song that both of us really like, and if I'm kind of hinting, I'll say I'm listening to whatever song it is. Or, I found something interesting about whatever movie you like. If you want to be less direct, find excuses to talk to the person.
ur pubes makes your dick look bigger." You'll see how fast they'll start man-scaping.
