Meff, 26
My girlfriend wants to make a tape of us having sex. What are the pros and cons of this scenario?
Pros: Being able to relive some of your hottest moments together whenever you want.
Cons: Reading the Xtube reviews. Those folks can be harsh, and they can't spell for shit.
What would sex be like with a girl whose favorite movie is. . .
Serpico?
She's earnest, hard-working, and plays by the books. That isn't saying she's vanilla: Anyone that dedicated to doing the right thing no matter what the cost is bound to have a dash of kink in 'em.
Conversely, she could just be a pretentious method actor obsessed with Al Pacino's "non-scenery-chewing years." In that case, expect a performance. Then rent her Dog Day Afternoon.
Waiting to Exhale?
She's a quiet storm that probably owns a Rabbit. Be careful of those nails, though!
Requiem for a Dream?
A cyclone. Extra points for scoring black tar! "Ass to ass" would also be an appropriate response.
What's a good date movie? 
Dead tie between Secretary and Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter. I figure, if my date can enjoy either one of those movies without questioning my motivations or sanity, we're good.
What's the best thing about dating a screenwriter?
You're never at a loss for a dramatic moment. There's a wonderful over-the-top romanticism that comes with someone who sees the entire world in a series of external and internal shots. Well-paced arguments, witty date banter and hyper-thoughtful grandiose gestures are de rigueur.
I'm sad because I just got dumped. What should I do?
Take a shower, put on your best outfit, walk out the door and don't come home until you've had an adventure. Or, if you're like myself and the rest of the planet, simply go out on the bender to end all benders and marry the first person you see. That'll be sure to yield wacky results. I mean hell, if it works for every sixth romantic comedy that's released every year, it's bound to work in real life, right?
Nigel, 25
What's the most cinematic date?
If you're a city boy like me, one of the coolest things is to get the hell out of town — if only for a day. I recently drove two hours north of Los Angeles to go wine tasting in the Santa Barbara vineyards. Totally Sideways and totally romantic if you go with the right person.
What's the best thing about dating a screenwriter?
They have a way with words, and maybe, just maybe, that means you'll be able to communicate.
Bad breakup — automatically going in a script?
Definitely. The script is actually being written mentally as the breakup is happening. Count on it.
You're flirting, you think it's mutual, but how can you tell that you're definitely going home together tonight?
Keep track of the "casual" touches. Those and eye contact are key. If both are there, your job is just to not mess it up.
What's the worst place to go on a date, and why?
If it's a first date, then the worst place to go is a bar, especially a bar with a lot of single people. Way too much potential for you or your date to go home with someone else. Plus, how do you get to know anyone in that atmosphere?
My partner wants to make a tape of us having sex. What are the pros and cons of this scenario?
Cons. Only cons. There's absolutely no way that that tape is for his or her eyes only. Unless you're looking to unleash your inner exhibitionist, just assume that others are going to see it — especially if there's a bad breakup. Oh, and copies! There's always a copy!
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