We've always been kind of fascinated by the SI Swimsuit Issue, but like the Victoria's Secret catalog or Playboy Magazine, we have to confess that as an erotic object we've generally found it a bit lacking. Maybe it's from how we grew up right when porn was starting to be everywhere? Like, it's great and all but... it's just so... nice. Sure, every once in a while they'll get a gal in there whose dewy, volcanic sexuality or inarguably perfect physique make for something truly remarkable -- Josie Maran and Elle MacPherson come to mind in those respective categories. But there's generally a lot of filler, too -- dozens of shots where you can imagine the photographer going "Great, great, now just give me a little giggle," and it comes off like a smutty Applebee's ad or something.
So we're pleased as punch to report that Marisa Miller will, at long last, make her debut as the cover model of this year's edition, following in the sandy footsteps of MacPherson, Heidi Klum, Christie Brinkley, and Cheryl Tiegs. Not only does she wield her implausibly hot body with a welcome bit of sly attitude, but, if you read our Victoria's Secret Fashion Show Wrapup, you'll know that she got her start in Perfect 10 magazine, meaning that as of today she's officially gone all the way from underpaid erotic model to the top of the fucking pops.
Are we tempted to say she's the Jackie Robinson of smut? Absolutely. Will we? No, probably not. Is she even the first model (that we know of) to make such a transition? We don't know; we're not so great with research. But we don't care. Let's just say she is!
So Hooray for Marisa Miller and hooray for us! God bless us, every one!
Sports Illustrated
Outtakes via GoldenFiddle