And by girls we mean young ones. Or is it older women that the nine-year-old author is hoping for?
Amazon just launched a book called "How To Pick Up Girls" that thankfully isn't written by Neil Strauss. The scribe is Castle Rock, Colorado native Alec Greven, who wrote the 48 page hardcover without the help of a ghostwriter (although the prose is too pat not to have been heavily edited by Collins, the publisher.)
Among Alec's tips:
Comb your hair and don't wear sweats [sorry, Alec, we've met too many losers meeting this criteria who have scored consistently]
Control your hyperness (cut down on the sugar if you have to)
Don't act desperate [indeed, showering girls with compliments leads to them freaking out, as we found out... oh, at about age 27.]
He also warns boys (aged 1-127, we're thinking) to avoid the good-looking broads:
It is easy to spot pretty girls because they have big earrings, fancy dresses and all the jewelry...
The best choice for most boys is a regular girl. Remember, some pretty girls are coldhearted when it comes to boys. Don't let them get to you.
And girls, the budding writer is currently single, so if you're interested in prison, global shame between the ages of 8 and 11, you could do worse than this charming lil' bastard... although, as another Scanner blogger comments, how long before he goes "from darling to douchebag?"
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