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Donnie Wahlberg's Mid-Life Crisis

Posted by Lindy Parker

Okay seriously, what's going on with Donnie Wahlberg?  Obviously, no one's really going to hold NKOTB's first run against him -- after all there was a time when the rat tail was the height of fashion, and as for that weird arson arrest, we've all been through hard times.  But really, over the last decade or so, it seemed like he'd totally gotten it together.  Band of Brothers, The Sixth Sense, Boomtown -- all bonafide actor gigs, nothing tongue-in-cheek or pathetic about them.  Further, when Vh1 came calling a few years ago for Bands Reunited to try and talk him into a NKOTB reunion concert, their camera crews couldn't even get in the parking lot of his condo.  He'd moved on, and it appeared as though his transition to artistic legitimacy was complete.  And now, what's happening? He voluntarily reassembled New Kids, recorded this ridiculous song about girls on the beach and flip flops, got divorced and now he's traipsing around town with one of the girls from Making the Band 3

First of all, she's kind of channelling Tara Reid in this picture, no?  Second, is she out of high school?  What do they talk about?  Will it be weird when Donnie walks into his teenage son's room and finds this picture of Aubrey taped to the back of his closet door?

Sorry, we didn't mean to get judge-y there.  Obviously people can do what they want, it just seems like Donnie's taken a bit of a hard right career-wise and we're trying to get our bearings.


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About Lindy Parker

Lindy Parker has worked as a ghostwriter, editor, dance instructor and a purveyor of dreams, one beer at a time. She now writes for hooksexup.com's TV blog, "The Remote Island." She loves Charles Dickens and Gabriel Garcia Marquez and also, straight-to-video releases with Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. It's possible she reads more teen fiction than she should. She hails from Los Angeles, her hometown and soul mate, but she lives in Brooklyn, the fling she'll never forget.

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Lindy Parker has worked as a ghostwriter, editor, dance instructor and a purveyor of dreams, one beer at a time. She loves Charles Dickens and Gabriel Garcia Marquez and also, straight-to-video releases with Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. It's possible she reads more teen fiction than she should. She hails from Los Angeles, her hometown and soul mate, but she lives in Brooklyn, the fling she'll never forget.

Olivia Purnell left Ohio for sunny Los Angeles; then found that she couldn’t ignore New York City’s call, and brought herself to Brooklyn where she has worked with GenArt, BlackBook, the School of American Ballet, and finished an M.A. in Creative Writing from N.Y.U. She loves one-liners with sting and hates the stench of the subway in the summer. That said, she can’t get enough of either.

Jake Kalish is a freelance journalist and humorist whose work has appeared in Details, Maxim, Stuff, New York Press, Spin, Blender, Men's Fitness, Poets and Writers, and Playboy, among other publications. He is also the author of Santa vs. Satan: The Official Compendium of Imaginary Fights.

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Ben Kallen is an entertainment, health and humor writer who's been lectured to by Sidney Poitier, argued with by Lea Thompson and smiled at by Jennifer Connelly. He's the coauthor of The No S Diet and author of The Year in Weird, along with hundreds of magazine articles. He lives near the beach in Los Angeles, just like the gang from Three's Company.

Nicole Ankowski has lived in Ohio, Oakland, and on the high plains of South Dakota, but is now proud to call Brooklyn home. She wrote for alternative weekly papers in the first two states, and tried to learn Lakota in the last. (The vowels can be tricky.) She just earned her MFA in Creative Writing and has been published in Beeswax literary journal. She is unable to resist good writing or bad TV.

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