Sex Advice From Drunk People

Carla, 23

What are some things to keep in mind when you're having drunk sex?
Don't vomit. Try to stay awake. When you're having drunk sex... I feel like whenever I'm having drunk sex, it's like I'm going to black out at any moment now, so stay awake.

What's the best way to pick up a drunk person?
Move your hand towards their crotch. That usually works. I think it's effortless.

What has drinking taught you about dating?
Um, what has drinking taught me about dating? With you in my face, this is a little too much. I have to think about it. Hold on...I think that entire relationships can be based on being drunk.

I want to send someone a drink at a bar. How can I figure out what to send?
You can never go wrong with a shot.

What kind of shot?
It depends on what they're wearing.

My girlfriend's friend hit on me. I'd feel guilty not telling her, but how should I do it?
I think you should just tell. Maybe you'll all have a threesome.

What's the one thing guys or girls always do wrong with foreplay?
If they're in their own world, and they're not really conscious of how you might feel. I remember one guy who was in his own world, and I felt like I was just this prop. I would say don't treat whoever you're with like a prop.

FIND MORE
Sex Advice From Potheads
Miss Information: We're just friends — until we get drunk and naked.
A Note From Your Drunk Date

Comments ( 15 )

It's only because I'm drunk right now that any of this makes sense to me.

JT commented on May 07 10 at 3:33 am

Oh come on, Roger, surely you could have given some advice for the MMF threesome, even if it's just a joke answer — don't worry, we won't think you're gay.

oh noes commented on May 07 10 at 9:21 am

RE. the threesome question: I think sometimes there can be boundry issues between women and gay men. Some women think they can step over a gay man's boundries because they have this preconception that we are all super open and up for everything etc. While it would not be unreasonable to expect a bit of boundry blurring in a 3way situation, don't assume that a gay guy would be any more willing to have sex with a woman than a straight guy would with another man.

Quack commented on May 07 10 at 9:27 am

this is the best conversation I have ever had.

drunk at work commented on May 07 10 at 9:53 am

One of my favorite Sex Advice From's ever. Very funny.

Dan commented on May 07 10 at 10:11 am

Propers to Warren

JRB commented on May 07 10 at 10:42 am

Warren= best. interviewee. ever.!!
"What's one thing that guys should never do during foreplay?" Funniest thing I've read in a while
Ejaculate.

LM commented on May 07 10 at 3:50 pm

Warren is awesome.

Jane commented on May 07 10 at 4:21 pm

I haven't read them yet but want to post my initial thought- awesome concept.

ta commented on May 07 10 at 8:14 pm

This should be a regular feature. It is my favorite thing that has ever happened. In history.

Name commented on May 07 10 at 10:10 pm

Agreed with the other posters - this is the best "Sex Advice From" that I've read in a really, really long time. All further "Advice From" columns should just be interviews with drunk people.

jvg commented on May 08 10 at 12:18 pm

definitely there should be a column dedicated to just interviewing drunk people. why has this never happened until now? warren sounds like a good time, that first fellow seems like you'd want to fake a seizure 20 minutes into a date with him to get out of it.

Name commented on May 08 10 at 1:06 pm

Maybe one has to be drunk to appreciate this column? Sober it seems to be below the usual level of lameness of this feature

twj commented on May 08 10 at 5:05 pm

i love how the first dude is just so sincerely trying to give helpful answers, but he's just too drunk. love it. he seems like a sweetie.

jane commented on May 10 10 at 10:36 am

Well I think it's pretty obvious what goes where in a MMF threesome.

Grytpype commented on May 11 10 at 12:08 am

Carla, 23

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