Warren, 24

So, what are some things to keep in mind when you're having drunk sex?
It's all about finishing. The number one plague of the sexually active drunkard is whiskey dick so don't think about baseball and don't try to hold off and come off as quickly as you can because that's her biggest fear and yours.

What has drinking taught you about dating?
What has drinking taught me about dating? Let's talk about what dating taught me drinking which is to say that is a great icebreaker, best done with strangers...I forgot the question. What has drinking taught me about dating?

My girlfriend's friend hit on me. I'd feel guilty not telling her about it but how should I do it?
Sit her down, preface it with a little bit of wine and make sure to reiterate the fact that you actually like her, if you do — if you like the friend more then this question is irrelevant —but if you like her and want to continue the relationship then bring it up in a casual way: "Hey I was flattered because your friend hit on me but I felt a little bit uncomfortable because I love you. I wanna marry you." It's funny, I didn't think I was drunk until I started doing this.

My boyfriend is bi and wants to have a threesome with his gay friend. I'm down but what should I do as a girl to not throw off the gay man's mojo?
Well, my girlfriend is a gay male so I can empathize. I say you sit down with your boyfriend before the whole thing starts and make a couple ground rules and if you're uncomfortable with certain sexual acts then make that explicit and if not, agree that you're going to have the experience, whatever's gonna happen is gonna happen, at the end of the night he's going to go home, the two of you will sleep in the same bed and in the morning —

I think you're confused. The question was what should the girl do to be considerate of the gay guy.
Cross your legs, sweetheart.

I'm dating a woman fifteen years older than I am who happens to be friends with my mom. How do I tell my mom without her freaking out?
That's a doozy. Never been there. I will say that once my mom's boyfriend hit on me which is sort of the same situation in reverse... I'm restarting my answer. Sit her down and be honest. If you're both adults and you have a close relationship with your mother she should be happy to know that you're dating and finding happiness with someone that she likes and that you like.

What's one thing that guys should never do during foreplay?
Ejaculate.

What's one thing guys should definitely do during foreplay?
Kiss your neck. That shit feels great.

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A Note From Your Drunk Date