Dating Confessions by You "Callin' me baby when I'm trying to get over you doesn't help. I just don't have the heart to ask you to stop because my heart skips a little each time you say it to me."
DISPATCHES
posted 4/30/2009
10) Jim Morrison
The archetype for all rock gods, Jim Morrison wore the title of Young Lion after a certain black-and-white photo shoot that left a nation weak at the knees. His moody, mysterious and unpredictable stage presence, his Hiawatha dances in leather pants, and lyrics like "I see a country in your eyes" made him a hypnotic sex symbol. He was too much for everyone, including himself; self-destructive behavior had killed him by twenty-seven, at which time there were about twenty paternity actions pending against him. — M.L.
promotion
9) Iggy Pop
The acts that transformed James Osterberg into Iggy Pop — the drug use, the rolling in broken glass, the stage diving — suggest a man obsessed with the pursuit of the id and the loss of self. By filtering that obsession through the tension and release of the Stooges' paranoid garage-blues, Pop stumbled upon a formula for wide-eyed, primal sexuality that, by many standards, remains unmatched to this day. He also looks really, really good without a shirt on. — J.B.
8) Joe Strummer
Punk progenitor Joe Strummer fronted the band that arguably brought that snarled, minimalist, critically derided music mainstream respectability. (For better or worse, sure, but who cares when it sounds this goddamn good?) Their 1980 album London Calling, a genre-defining and defying mélange of punk, pop, rockabilly and reggae, is routinely hailed as one of the greatest albums of all time. His genius was to perform political songs (about consumerism, racism, violence, drugs) that refused to hit the fan over the head with their Importance. It's pointed, angry music that somehow makes the listener happy. As for sexy, just slap on a leather jacket, a pair of Wayfarers and some Strummer-style swagger and try fighting off the admirers. — B.G.
7) Bruce Springsteen
Sure, there's something a little mannered about the Boss' palooka-with-a-heart-o'-gold schtick, but his epic-level sexiness is a matter of record — specifically, the best-selling record of summer '84. That magnificent Jersey ass is Springsteen for the millions of Americans who may never listen to Nebraska. Accordant with the large-scale iconography of Born in the U.S.A. are Springsteen's live shows, which essentially constitute two-plus hours of orgasm. Just watch the crowd when our man hits "the highway's jammed with broken heroes" etc. The whole spectacle is so priapic that we once attempted to establish the verb "to Bruce" as a synonym for sexual release. That it failed to catch on was a little embarrassing, but we felt vindicated watching Bruce's epic manhood careen into the camera during this year's Super Bowl halftime show. Lest ye forget, oh faithless America. — P.S.
6) Robert Plant
Tori Amos' I-finally-made-it moment: she was sitting in some club's green room when her phone rang. She picked it up and a slick British voice asked, "Is this Tori?" "Yes, who is this?" "Why, it's Robert Plant, darling." Amos then looked in the mirror and mouthed the words: it's Robert Plant. Seems like the only natural reaction. Back in 1969, the world already had its Jaggers, but it was in no way prepared for this sinewy, shrieking man. The jeans, the lion-mane hair, and the dripping-lemon carnality. The man could melt existence. Plant's sexiness has become less potent in the past three decades, but you can still see it burning, even when he's singing half-baked country songs with Alison Krauss. — J.C.
