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Hot or Not: Heidi Klum Topless in Esquire

Posted by Brian Fairbanks

Okay, there really isn't much question on this one, is there? We were kind of kidding about the "hot or not" part just to make you click.

In our latest installment of hot topless women on the covers of American magazines, we have Heidi Klum in Esquire. Unfortunately, we are sick to death of all reality shows and, in particular, reality show hosts. Especially ones that are married to Seal, whom we dislike for that song of his we hear every time we're in C-Town with a hangover.

In any case, fans must wonder why these photos are going up online now-- perhaps to celebrate Project Runway's move to-- gulp-- the Lifetime Television Network? Well, if this is the new look of Lifetime, we may finally stop for more than four seconds when we get to it...

 

 


The rest of the photos by Rankin are archived here in a blog post from over the weekend.

These were mainly unavailable online until then, so so what if the original Esquire feature is two years old? You want us to take these down? We thought not.

And don't forget to vote in our Who Would You Rather? poll, featuring two other reality show stars...


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Comments

borstalboy said:

Sorta hot.  Definitely obvious.  Would rather have some Gordon Ramsey shirtless shots.

April 14, 2008 2:50 PM

Bryan Christian said:

Actually, unless the pound is more powerful than I realized, that's British Esquire.

April 14, 2008 3:01 PM

Brian Fairbanks said:

It is indeed British Esquire.

I just like their versions better. And it was already on the blog. And who knows, maybe it wasn't ever even on the cover of the American version. Losers.

April 14, 2008 3:07 PM

danrimage said:

I honestly can't say I've evert noticed this woman before (is she Leonardo's ex? Or to put it another way, who gives a fuck?). But these images, trite and obvious as they are, bypass all my conscious aesthetics and higher brain functions and operate directly on the area marked 'partially clothed woman fetish'.

Wearing nothing but red and black, stripey, knee-high, motherfucking socks? How....did....she....know.....?.....

April 14, 2008 4:56 PM

vivazoya said:

I think she's bony and gross.

April 16, 2008 10:57 PM

About Brian Fairbanks

Brian Fairbanks, the Senior National Political Correspondent for Hooksexup, is a filmmaker living in Brooklyn or New Orleans, depending on the season. He is a heavily-armed advocate of gun control.

in

about the blogger

Emily Farris writes about culture and food for numerous publications and websites you've probably never heard of, including her own blog eefers. Her first cookbook, Casserole Crazy: Hot Stuff for Your Oven was published in 2008. Emily recently escaped New York and now lives in a ridiculously large apartment in Kansas City, MO with her cat, but just one... so far.

Brian Fairbanks is a filmmaker living in the wilds of Brooklyn. He previously wrote for the Hartford Courant and Gawker. He won the Williamsburg Spelling Bee once. He loves cats, women with guns, and burning books.

Colleen Kane has been an editor at BUST and Playgirl magazines and has written for the endangered species of dead-tree magazines like SPIN and Plenty, as well as Radar Online and other websites. She lives in exile in Baton Rouge with her fiance, two dogs, and her former cat. Read her personal blogs at ColleenKane.com.

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