Those of us who came of age in the ’70s long ago came to grips with the realization that there is absolutely no aspect of our childhoods that won’t be recycled, regurgitated or (guh) re-imagined by Evil, Evil Hollywood. Whether the final straw was Tim Burton’s Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Richard Linklater’s Bad News Bears or that TV movie about Evel Knievel starring the guy from CSI is a matter to be debated by scholars and historians for decades to come. One thing we know for sure, however: it isn’t over yet. We know this because Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson (you know, the Tooth Fairy) has signed on for something called Race to Witch Mountain.
It’s not that 1975’s Escape to Witch Mountain is some sort of untouchable classic. If its release didn’t coincide with your time in grade school, it’s even possible that you’ve never heard of it. The story of two orphans with paranormal abilities fleeing an evil tycoon (Ray Milland) with the help of a curmudgeonly Winnebago driver (Eddie Albert) was fairly typical Disney fare of the time, but it struck a chord with those of us kids who enjoyed entertaining the possibility, however slim, that we might develop the ability to make the family station wagon fly. Also, I’m confident I was not the only seven-year-old on my block with a big crush on Tia, the girl witch played by Kim Richards. (Fun IMDb fact: Kim Richards is Paris Hilton’s aunt.)
In the new version, expected to be a more action-oriented affair, the Rock plays a Vegas cabbie who helps the witchy kids escape the clutches of Ciaran Hinds. Redundantly enough, this is not even the first time Witch Mountain has been remade. A made-for-TV version aired in 1995, and you can watch the whole thing on YouTube, beginning with the clip below.