Inspired by the terrific new documentary Not Quite Hollywood, the Screengrab is proud to present Ozsploitation! For the next ten or twelve weeks, or however long it takes you or me to get sick of them, we'll be checking out classics from the golden age of Austrailian drive-in movies. As you may or may not know, Australia was one of the few countries outside the United States to develop a thriving drive-in culture. They love their cars as much as we do, and apparently they also share our fondness for bare breasts, dangerous beasties, exploding heads and good old-fashioned automotive mayhem. If any of our friends down under are reading this, please bear in mind that I'm seeing most of these films for the first time and feel free to weigh in with your own memories and expertise.
We begin with 1987's Dark Age, which was screened this week at Fantastic Fest as part of a mini-Ozploitation retrospective centered around Not Quite Hollywood. Our director is Arch Nicholson, who was given the job based on his work as second unit director on the hit Razorback (which we'll be checking out next week). As it turns out, none of the footage he shot was actually used in Razorback, but I'm sure he didn't mention that in his interview. John Jarratt, who much later played the very creepy Outback killer in Wolf Creek, stars as wildlife ranger Steve Harris. Steve is an advocate for the protection of the endangered saltwater crocodile, but his cause is undermined when a giant croc turns up in the river and starts eating people, including a small child.
Steve explains to his superiors that the croc had no way of knowing that eating children is considered a bad thing, but they won't hear of it. He is ordered to kill the croc, and if he doesn't do it, there are dozens of poachers along the river willing to take on the job for the reward money. Efforts to track down the croc, known to the natives as Numunwari, prove fruitless, although the poachers are happy to blow apart any number of regular-sized crocodiles along the way. Steve is forced to turn to Aboriginal chief Oondabund (a wonderfully named character played by the equally wonderfully named Burnham Burnham from Howling III: The Marsupials).
Oondanbund agrees to help as long as they agree not to kill Numunwari, but rather capture him and return him to his billabong. (Rest assured I will capitalize on any and all opportunities to use the word 'billabong' throughout this series.) This entails strapping the nearly 30-foot croc into the back of an 18-wheeler for a high-speed chase through the bush, with the poachers in hot pursuit.
Some would say a killer crocodile movie is only as good as its killer croc, and by those guidelines, Dark Age comes up a bit short. The croc looks fine at night in the water, and there are some great overhead shots that accentuate the size and girth of the thing, but when it's called upon to move on land in broad daylight, Numanwari isn't quite up to the task. The movie is also weighed down by an obligatory on-again, off-again romance between Steve and his ex Cathy (Nikki Coghill), but in the end, all the right people get eaten. And that's the important thing.
Bonus Attraction: In a stunt that couldn't possibly have been planned the way it turned out, Burnham Burnham is flung from the front of the 18-wheeler as it careens out of control. He turns out to be one resiliant white-bearded old man!
Rating: Three Foster's
