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Kanye West: Musician, Mogul, . . . Puppeteer?

Posted by Olivia Purnell

 

Kanye West has purportedly signed on to produce a puppet show with Comedy Central.  Titled Alligator Boots, the show is said to be “hip-hop meets the Muppets.”

 We have so many questions . . .

1.    Will this show be in anyway like a puppet reprisal of In Living Color?  Specifically, will there be fly girls puppets introducing each sketch with a Rosie Perez choreographed hip-hop dance segment?  (If so, and we have our fingers crossed, each puppet must wear Cross Colours stretch pants and doorknocker earrings).

2.    Will Kanye challenge Jim Henson to some sort of showdown reminiscent of the Kanye West versus 50 Cent face-off of 2007.  We don’t know how this little throwdown would go.  Perhaps its a question of who can make the illest puppets, or whose show sells the most DVDs . . . we haven’t worked out all the details yet.

3.    Will Kanye’s friend, the shit-house crazy and crazy-hilarious Dave Chappelle be writing dirty puppet jokes and making frequent guest appearances on this show?

If the answers to all of the above questions are yes (honestly, we’ll take two out of three), we will have this show all over our DVR, the theme song will be our ring tone, and we will personally inform the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences that they best not pass Kanye over.  He’s coming for that puppet Emmy.


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Lindy Parker has worked as a ghostwriter, editor, dance instructor and a purveyor of dreams, one beer at a time. She loves Charles Dickens and Gabriel Garcia Marquez and also, straight-to-video releases with Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. It's possible she reads more teen fiction than she should. She hails from Los Angeles, her hometown and soul mate, but she lives in Brooklyn, the fling she'll never forget.

Olivia Purnell left Ohio for sunny Los Angeles; then found that she couldn’t ignore New York City’s call, and brought herself to Brooklyn where she has worked with GenArt, BlackBook, the School of American Ballet, and finished an M.A. in Creative Writing from N.Y.U. She loves one-liners with sting and hates the stench of the subway in the summer. That said, she can’t get enough of either.

Jake Kalish is a freelance journalist and humorist whose work has appeared in Details, Maxim, Stuff, New York Press, Spin, Blender, Men's Fitness, Poets and Writers, and Playboy, among other publications. He is also the author of Santa vs. Satan: The Official Compendium of Imaginary Fights.

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Ben Kallen is an entertainment, health and humor writer who's been lectured to by Sidney Poitier, argued with by Lea Thompson and smiled at by Jennifer Connelly. He's the coauthor of The No S Diet and author of The Year in Weird, along with hundreds of magazine articles. He lives near the beach in Los Angeles, just like the gang from Three's Company.

Nicole Ankowski has lived in Ohio, Oakland, and on the high plains of South Dakota, but is now proud to call Brooklyn home. She wrote for alternative weekly papers in the first two states, and tried to learn Lakota in the last. (The vowels can be tricky.) She just earned her MFA in Creative Writing and has been published in Beeswax literary journal. She is unable to resist good writing or bad TV.

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