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Sean Stewart of "Celebrity Rehab" Settles Lawsuit Over Bar Brawl

Posted by Jake Kalish

So a few days back we posted about our favorite cast member of Celebrity Rehab With Dr. Drew, Jeff Conaway. (Is "cast member" the right term? Patient? Addict? Whatever, we dig Conaway.) Now is the time to discuss our least favorite substance abuser on the show, Sean Stewart, who this past week settled a case over a 2006 bar brawl that left a guy named Daniel Refoa with a broken nose, among other injuries.

Now, don't get us wrong - we hope Sean "Son of Rod" Stewart gets clean and all that. But we don't have to like the guy. Maybe it's the fact that only nepotism and overindulgence made Sean Stewart sort of famous in the first place; he got known for going apeshit and having way too much of everything at Hollywood glamour parties, a "skill" that got him onto an A&E reality show about nepotism and overindulgence, Sons Of Hollywood. Sean Stewart wrote and sang the theme for Sons of Hollywood. It's called "The In Crowd",  and it goes like this, sung in the manner of Vince Neil:

This is the life/This is the life/This is the life/of the in crowd!

Shut the fuck up, dude. But there's more not to like about Sean Stewart. There's his snivelly voice, dripping with entitlement. His constant use of "bro" and "homes" in casual conversation. That face you just want to punch. Seriously, we would like to get in a bar brawl with Sean Stewart. Although we aren't members of this "in crowd", so we probably couldn't get into the VIP room to kick the living shit out of Sean. And it shouldn't be a bar brawl, we don't want to mess with his sobriety. A tea-sipping brawl, after we openly discuss our feelings, and the problems in our childhood.

Okay, perhaps violence is not the answer. We would like Sean Stewart to get himself clean and then progressively make more and more of a jackass of himself on worse and worse reality shows. That seems doable.

-- Jake Kalish is the author of Santa vs. Satan: The Official Compendium of Imaginary Fights


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About Jake Kalish

Jake Kalish is the author of Santa vs. Satan: The Official Compendium of Imaginary Fights https://www.amazon.com/Santa-vs-Satan-Compendium-Imaginary/dp/0307406709/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1208807460&sr=8-1

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Bryan Christian has worked as a writer for Epicurious, GenArt and ID magazine; a web producer for WWD and Condé Nast; and a cameraman for his friends. He's married with roommate and lives in Clinton Hill, Brooklyn.

Lindy Parker has worked as a ghostwriter, editor, dance instructor and a purveyor of dreams, one beer at a time. She loves Charles Dickens and Gabriel Garcia Marquez and also, straight-to-video releases with Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. It's possible she reads more teen fiction than she should. She hails from Los Angeles, her hometown and soul mate, but she lives in Brooklyn, the fling she'll never forget.

Olivia Purnell left Ohio for sunny Los Angeles; then found that she couldn’t ignore New York City’s call, and brought herself to Brooklyn where she has worked with GenArt, BlackBook, the School of American Ballet, and finished an M.A. in Creative Writing from N.Y.U. She loves one-liners with sting and hates the stench of the subway in the summer. That said, she can’t get enough of either.

Jake Kalish is a freelance journalist and humorist whose work has appeared in Details, Maxim, Stuff, New York Press, Spin, Blender, Men's Fitness, Poets and Writers, and Playboy, among other publications. He is also the author of Santa vs. Satan: The Official Compendium of Imaginary Fights.

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Ben Kallen is an entertainment, health and humor writer who's been lectured to by Sidney Poitier, argued with by Lea Thompson and smiled at by Jennifer Connelly. He's the coauthor of The No S Diet and author of The Year in Weird, along with hundreds of magazine articles. He lives near the beach in Los Angeles, just like the gang from Three's Company.

Nicole Ankowski has lived in Ohio, Oakland, and on the high plains of South Dakota, but is now proud to call Brooklyn home. She wrote for alternative weekly papers in the first two states, and tried to learn Lakota in the last. (The vowels can be tricky.) She just earned her MFA in Creative Writing and has been published in Beeswax literary journal. She is unable to resist good writing or bad TV.

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