Dirty Byrd, Juggalo
A Sewing Machine

The most important person in my life is my girl, so I’m going with a sewing machine — not one of those old pawnshop machines like she used to have, but one of those new computerized high-tech ones. She’ll go to town on thing, man! Just bananas. She’ll get like thirty Juggalo shirts on eBay, cut ‘em up, and then make tube tops out of them. She doesn’t make stuff for me because I’m not into tube tops, but sometimes she’ll take one of my old shirts and maybe a pair of shorts and put them together and make some cool shit out of that. She also made a sweet cape for her little brother —like a little Juggalo/vampire cape. It’s fun for her. Plus, she doesn’t like jewelry and shit like that; she likes stuff she can use. And I love her.