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Nicole, 28

asknicolegeorges.blogspot.com



What's the best way for me to pick up a zinester?

The best way to pick up a zinester is at the Portland Zine Symposium or another zine conference. You'll have hundreds of captive zinesters stuck behind their tables, peddling their wares all day long. Get there mid-day when they're starving and bring them a snack, or show up at the end of the day and ask, "Hey, what are you doing after this?" or, "Do you need help carrying all those zines back to your car?" Even if they didn't like you initially, they'll give you a chance based on their primal need for nourishment and help.



Does creating zines bring you any more action than any other creative endeavor, like photography or architecture?

I would imagine that zinesters get more action only because they are the most approachable of artists. People can see that what you're doing is hand-made, so they feel a connection to you, and then, lo and behold, your address is on the back of the art, so they're welcome to write you and tell you all about their crush, whereas with architects, it seems a little harder to connect.

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Zinesters are creative and cool — what's a creative and cool idea for an awesome first date?

You could meet at the library, go get a bubble tea, then make out in the bushes after you are totally jacked on sugar and caffeine!



Some say zine writing is a dying art, kind of like foreplay. My girlfriend is short on foreplay, and I need it and like it. What are some ways to draw it out that will keep us both interested?

You're going to have to frustrate your girlfriend the next time you get in bed. Playfully get away from her every time she's hot and heavy and ready to go for it. Keep your junk just out of arm's reach and make her work for it!

My single friends and I want action, so I was thinking about hosting a singles night at my place or a bar. How can I make sure it's fun?

Ask ten of your friends to suggest one or two good-quality singles for you to invite.
Make it a theme, like a murder mystery party, so no one feels fearful of an awkward night spent holding a drink in the corner. People will have to interact whilst playing the game, which will break the ice, and afterwards you can all have a drink, a good laugh, and swap keys on your way out the door.



Every month my girlfriend is on to something new in bed. She's a total adventurer, and while it was fun at first, I'm getting worn out. Sometimes, I just want hot missionary sex and that doesn't turn her on at all. Is there a compromise somewhere in this?

Have hot missionary sex while pretending to be her soccer coach or her school principal. That's the solution for the short term. But for the long term, are you ever actually just hanging out having a good time together or do you always have to be wearing a doctor's mask and a horsetail butt plug? She should be able to make some compromises for your satisfaction, or at least work out a solution with you. If you want to bring it up, I think you should do it sometime when you're both relaxed and not having sex. Give her some wine and bring up that you love having adventurous sex, but you also loved having some vanilla times and you want to know if they can be integrated into your new, exciting sex life. Flatter her, don't criticize, and tell her it would only make things better.

Pete, 31

www.junkpirate.com



Is it wrong to date someone for their craft? Like, is it wrong that I'm interested in photographers because I like having my picture taken?

What someone does is usually a big part of who they are, so it's fine to date somebody for their craft. If it's only their craft you are attracted to, it probably won't work out in the long run. Especially with photographers.

I am broke and working my ass off, so I don't have a lot of time for my boyfriend — how can we get the most out of my limited time without spending a lot of money?

Do things together that are free, like hiking or skating or bike riding. It is also very romantic and thrifty to cook meals together rather than going out to eat. Oh yeah, sex is free, too.



My single friends and I want action, so I was thinking about hosting a singles night at my place or a bar. How can I make sure it's fun?

Rule number one: get lots of booze. Everything else will fall into place.



What's the best way to recover from saying the wrong name in bed? It's happened once, and now I'm terrified it will happen again.

Pretend it's a new pet name you are giving to your partner's genitals. Then prepare to talk dirty.



Every month my girlfriend is on to something new in bed. She's a total adventurer, and while it was fun at first, I'm getting worn out. Sometimes, I just want hot missionary sex and that doesn't turn her on at all. Is there a compromise somewhere in this?

Hopefully so, because your girlfriend sounds like a great person. Maybe go for the missionary early in the morning when your girlfriend is too tired to get adventurous.

Do you have any codes of dating ethics that you live by?

If your date is mean to the waiter at a restaurant, bail out. Also, all men are stupid and all women are crazy. Not really a code of ethics, but if you keep that in mind you'll be a lot less disappointed in romance.