Well aren't you just the enlightened soul!!!

Perhaps you think you've had some kind of epiphany with this topic.  Holy shit, man!!! They're just like us!!! Don't you other people see it???

I don't know if you see it or are capable, but in your declaration of finding yourself above it all, you've lumped all physically challenged people into just another stereotype.  You've defined these women by their challenges.  

Perhaps you should wait until you get to know a physically challenged person, or a few.

Essentially all you've said here is that you would fuck her despite her challenge, because your initial perception is that she's courageous and confident enough to show herself in public without shame.  

Shame on you.  Really.  Shame on you.

Did it ever occur to you that she may not be attracted to you anyway?  

Hilarious..

For the record, a physically challenged person is no more capable of being indifferent to their problems than you and I are of being indifferent to our own challenges, which will always be considerably less!  You and I have the advantage though of working through some of our obstacles, and eventually achieving a point where they disappear.  

This is not condescending.  It's reality.  Many of our challenges are perceptual.  Consider that.  This is not pity.  It is reality.  

My brother turned 49 this year.  He has cerebral palsy.  He's lead an interesting life and achieved things that many people never had the courage to attempt.  The one thing he would like though, is for people to stop considering him "the brave handicapped boy."  Every single thing that he's ever done don't add up to anything that anybody else hasn't done, but it will all be defined by the simple fact that a guy with cerebral palsy did it.  Simply, he's tired of being called special.  If you think a single waking moment of his life has gone by where he has felt "indifferent" to his differences though... He will tell you that it's not a question of being courageous.  It's just a question of not having choices.  

I e-mailed your post to him.  He just wrote back.

"Oh, fuck him."  

I think people are misinterpreting this.

Pretty woman, rolling down the street

Pretty woman, without no working feet

Pretty woman

Please do not mind me, I like to stare

At your confinement, trapped in your chair

Mercy

Pretty woman, won't you pardon me

Pretty woman, maybe you'd like to see

Pretty woman

Inside my mind, the thoughts that lurk

About your parts that still might work

Wow

Pretty woman, don't roll on by

Pretty woman, make me cry

Pretty woman, don't roll away, hey...okay

If that's the way it must be, okay

I guess I'll go on home, it's late

I'll find a corpse to boff, but wait

What do I see?

Is she rolling back to me?

Yeah, she's walking back to me?

Oh, oh, Pretty woman

You...dick. Using the (hopelessly) outdated term 'Orientalist' to describe your narrow-minded astonishment at the handicaps of others is, simply, fucked up. I'm almost glad that Dating Machine is getting turned off as it means the likes of you will have one less chance to go about spewing your racist, prejudiced opinions on the internet.

What is this, a night school creative writing class where the frustrated writers can't wait to rip each other apart?  Sorry, but that's boring.  Can't we talk about something more interesting--like exactly how far down the physically able food chain Amboabe would go?  So far we have (1) wheelchair chicks, and (2) pointy-arm flipper girls.  How about that chick from the TLC documentary with no legs, and just a torso?  Better yet, here's a 'who would you rather'.  Would you rather fuck a really hot chick with no arms; or an ugly girl with nice tits, but a lazy eye and really bad eczema?  (I know, that's a tough one.)

Anyway, all this is basically to say to the critics in the comment string--please, stop crying, and lighten the fuck up.  Or if that's not possible, at least go cry yourself to sleep on your cripple-loving pillows tonight, and leave poor Ambo alone.

Where can a guy go to meet a nice girl in a wheelchair?  Just hang out by the ramp, of course!  It doesn't hurt to be handily wielding a can of WD-40 either.

You shouldn't be surprised at airheadgibberish and reducedbrooklyn ganging up on you, she the queen of self-righteous twittery and he her would-be knight in shining armour.  Pay them no heed.

Hey Ambo -

I'm better than you, and smarter than you, and I personally know 43 disabled people. Personally.  

Nah nah, nah nah, nah, nah. You stoopid penis.

Keep whistling past the graveyard of your own insignificance, sweetie.  On the bright side, soon you'll be decrepit enough for ambo to find attractive.  Chin up, old girl!

Aw, trolling you guys has been so much fun.  I'm gonna miss Hate Machine.  I mean Date Machine.

Yeah, let's discourage any dissent and maintain the last few days as a mutual admiration society.  I'm okay, you're okay.  

If you want to be a writer, get used to the critical response.  Man up and take it.

Probably best not to think for a second that what you call misinterpretations could be your own fault, the result of failings in your own "craft."  I have to admit though I don't believe I misinterpreted a single thing.

If you are out in public wearing a New England Patriots jersey, one might surmise that you are a Pats fan.  Don't blame other people if you came off like a dick. Talk about indignation... pot, kettle black... and so on.  

The responses from the other assclowns reminds me of the faithful NY Post readers who defended Sean Delonas' monkey cartoon.  Lighten up, they said.  A person can't criticize anything they find insensitive, cruel or wrong-minded anymore without the sneers of those who are really only defending their own right to be jerks, because being mindful of others requires a bit of effort now and again.  Go home and listen to Howard Stern, weaklings.  

Hilarious responses. I'll 0.02 to the tune of that at least when you're being petty and cruel you FEEL petty and cruel.

No takers?  Fine.  How about this one, if you had a gun to your head, who would you fuck: a chick with a smoking hot body, but Rea Perlman's face (plus it's half paralyzed with Bell's Palsy); or a chick with a face and body like 'Denise Austin-in-her-prime', but she has that condition that makes her smell like rotting fish.

Hell, let's make it interesting.  Let's throw AHG in the mix--except she won't shut the fuck up the whole time.

Tough, I know.  It's like Sophie's Choice, right?

Hey recycled, I understand that you're particularly sensitive because your brother is crippled, but I really take offense to your last post.  I happen to have a 37 year-old sister who suffers from "assclown syndrome", and it's people like you who make it so hard for her to be taken seriously.  It's not her fault that tiny circus performers have taken up residence in her rectum.  And she's sick and tired of being known as the "poor brave girl with the tiny humorous anal parasites".  So really, I think you owe me an apology.

My status as an assclown is not perceptual, it is tragically real. I was born with red polyester ass hair and clown nose where my anus should be.

However, I refuse to by defined by the clown that is my ass, despite everyone's constant referral to me as that "brave little assclown that could."

Hey S. Hawking, I wanna meet your sister. Sounds like we have a lot in common.

Okay, the phrases that I found offensive:

"There was no apologia in her eyes..."  Should there be?  

"She had the same look of serene confidence on her face that the woman in the wheelchair had. Before I might have fixated on the bizarre shape of her deformed limb, but it became part of the periphery. Her indifference to her limb combined with an unafraid smile as we passed was completely alluring."

Do you not see how that despite what you say, there is a clear inference that you are balancing their attitudes against their disabilities?  That's condescension any way you cut it.  

And her "indifference to her limb..."  Do you really believe that?  

Overall, it's hard to get away from the impression that you are giving yourself a good pat on the back.

You do this weird thing when you write sometimes where you put yourself in to the heads of people whose lives and experience are so far removed from your own.  An example is your hooker post where you started down from your balcony in "admiration" of her "freedom."  Really?  Do you really believe she is free?  It baffles me, truly.

This is not a personal attack per se.  You write these autobiographical pieces that may or may not reflect who you really are as a person.  Whether this is you, or an alter-ego musing, some of your thoughts leave me mortified, and more than a little bit embarrassed for you, or your narrator.  You choose.

And perhaps I come off as self-righteous.  Perhaps I really am.  That doesn't make me wrong either.  

People who say "man up" should be forced to have one.

Hey Whatever, that was really offensive, I think you should withdraw your comment.  Well, maybe not the "red polyester ass hair" part, that part can stay.

For the record, the Roy Orbison thing was fucking hilarious...

Whatever, sorry, my sister is already betrothed to a guy with 'rodeo clown urethra' (cowboy hat-shaped growth on his penis, scrotum resembling leather chaps).  

Why don't you respond to the fools, AHG?  Here's a proposition--I'll stop as soon as you make a convincing argument that what I've been saying isn't funny.  Better yet, I'll stop as soon as Zeit tells me it isn't funny.  

For the record, I did the Roy Orbison thing.  Yes, I'm hilarious.  No, I am not the other troll (obviously posing as multiple trolls) who is clearly inferior (he even embarrasses me).

Also for the record, ambo has, in the past, responded quite sportingly to my trolling.  We trolls are being ignored herein because he is too shaken -- he obviously fears that he has lost his dear friends' respect!  Poor kid.

I'm sorry, I misspoke.  I meant to say that S.Hawking is 'embarassingly superior' to me.

Larry--even a broken clock is right twice a day.  Orbison good... the rest... okay.  

Stephen, I believe the spell checker on YOUR wheelchair is broken.

Recycled, AHG said I was funny in addition to the Orbison thing, so there!

Whatever, sorry for the spelling error, but I think you're grossly underestimating how hard it is to type using a tube to blow through and a computer.  

Holy fucking shit--"As I've said before, these posts are not explications of my own fabulosity."--That was the most perfect explanation of the difference between your writing style and hers that I could imagine.

In fact, quick, you have to go register 'explications_of_my_own_fabulosity.blogspot.com' before AHG does!!

I think this entire post is a joke.  If you are a man that

encounters a woman in a wheel chair, and she attracts you,

introduce yourself and ask her if she would like to spend lunch together or share a cup of coffee. Love comes in many shapes and forms. Get it here you can. The people commenting on this post are either baboons or don't know life is for living and loving.

Fuck that, ask her out for drinks. Strong drinks.  

this piece explains many of the pictures in the galleries.  apparently there is a facination with disfigurement: women who have had some terrible injury requiring their nipples, labia, eye brows or tongues to be reattached with steel pins or rings; men and women who by some chemical or radiation exposure have lost all their body hair below their necks.  seriously though, the condescending voices methinks protest too much.  are you sublimating your own dark thoughts and sublimating by condemning others?  i wonder how many others who have a paralysis of one or both lower extremities share in the experience of a date being amazed that not all lower parts are paralyzed?  i am told, many have.