Nick Schager's Top Ten Worst Movies Ever
1) THEY'RE JUST MY FRIENDS (2006)
2) HOUSE OF THE DEAD (2003)
3) PAY IT FORWARD (2000)
So sickly sweet is the premise of Pay it Forward – little altruistic boy (Haley Joel Osment) devises a domino-effect plan in which people repay favors by doing good deeds for others – it’s likely to give you diabetes. And so brazenly manipulative is Mimi Leder’s award-baiting drama, which also concerns Kevin Spacey’s badly burned social studies teacher finding love with Osment’s alcoholic mommy Helen Hunt, that it may as well feature “Award Clip” subtitles under its many mawkish scenes. Did I mention that, after Osment has compassionately started to change the world, the kid gets shot dead? Shameless doesn’t begin to describe the multitude of tear-jerking ploys employed by this sentimental weepy.
4) BABY GENIUSES (1999)
5) BATTLEFIELD EARTH (2000)
6) SUPER CAPERS (2009)
All the references in the world can’t save Super Capers from being the nadir of cinematic homages, a tongue-in-cheek riff on ‘80s superhero and sci-fi films which believes that merely alluding to classic predecessors is enough to keep fanboys entertained. Sloppy and inane, it nightmarishly epitomizes the downside to technology affording wannabe filmmakers the means to realize their big-screen dreams.
7) BATMAN & ROBIN (1997)
8) MIXED NUTS (1994)
9) THE EXORCIST II (1977)
10) TROLL 2 (1990)
The forthcoming documentary Best Worst Movie will surely win Troll 2 some new fans, if only because it’ll clue filmgoers into the mind-boggling scene in which young protagonist Joshua prevents his family from eating evil food by urinating all over the kitchen table. Yet no matter how unintentionally funny it may be, there’s no getting around the sheer dreadfulness of this pseudo-sequel, which in every respect lives up to – if not actually surpasses – its disreputable reputation.
Click Here For Part One, Two, Three, Five, Six, Seven, Eight, Nine & Ten
Contributor: Nick Schager