The Screengrab

Each Thursday this summer we’ll hop in the Screengrab time machine and jump back thirty years to see what was new and exciting at the neighborhood moviehouse this week in…The Summer of ’78!

Heaven Can Wait

Release Date: June 28, 1978

Cast: Warren Beatty, Julie Christie, Charles Grodin, James Mason, Jack Warden, Dyan Cannon

The Buzz: McCabe and Mrs. Miller together again – this time in a lighthearted romp!

Keywords: Sweat Suit, Poisoning, Quarterback, Afterlife, Saxophone, Super Bowl

The Plot: In this sort-of remake of the 1941 comedy Here Comes Mr. Jordan (although the opening credits cite the original play Heaven Can Wait, on which Jordan was also based), Warren Beatty stars as L.A. Rams backup quarterback Joe Pendleton, who is about to get his big break. Trainer Max Corkle (Jack Warden) informs Joe that he’ll be starting Sunday’s game against the Dallas Cowboys, which is good news, but then Joe is hit by a car while riding his bike, which isn’t so good.

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Our fearless – and quite possibly senseless – movie janitor is watching every movie on the IMDb Bottom 100 list. Join us now for another installment of Unwatchable.

I don’t remember lapsing into a coma or being cryogenically frozen at any point during the summer of 2003, but something must have happened, because I have absolutely no memory of the existence of Marci X. The IMDb tells me it opened on 1200 screens on August 24th of that year, earning a not so robust $872,950 in its opening weekend en route to a total gross of just over $1.6 million. That would be a flop, sure, but I saw plenty of flops that summer on behalf on the Fort Worth Star-Telegram. Maybe Marci X just never made it to Texas, but somehow enough people saw this Lisa Kudrow/Damon Wayans vehicle to secure it a spot in the Bottom 100.

“Hip-hop meets shop ’til you drop” says the poster, and I wouldn’t be terribly surprised to learn that’s the exact line overrated screenwriter Paul Rudnick (In and Out, The Stepford Wives) used to pitch this plastic satire.

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Our fearless – and quite possibly senseless – movie janitor is watching every movie on the IMDb Bottom 100 list. Join us now for another installment of Unwatchable.

The kernel of almost any bad movie is a really terrible idea, and at first glance it appears that 2005’s big screen version of The Honeymooners fits the bill. It reeks of a concept dreamed up in a corner cubicle at Paramount Pictures by a junior development executive desperate to hang onto his job. “I’ve got it!” he shouts, jumping up from his chair and dumping his coffee all over his never-used keyboard. “The Black Honeymooners! Eddie Murphy IS Ralph Kramden! Chris Rock IS Norton!”

Alas, the junior executive’s dream cast fails to develop, and eventually it is Cedric the Entertainer who tries to fill the Great One’s shoes, with Mike Epps as his long-suffering sidekick. As The Honeymooners opens, it is 1999 and Brooklyn bus driver Ralph Kramden (Mr. Entertainer) is putting his “Bustin’ Loose” moves on passenger Alice (Gabrielle Union).

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It can't have been long after the first documentary film was made that some enterprising wise-ass with a cut-rate kinetoscope hit upon the idea of making a fake documentary. After all, since it's an age-old comedy trope that reality always outstrips satire, it only makes sense to create satire that apes reality as closely as possible.  Walk Hard:  The Dewey Cox Story opens wide this weekend, and there's plenty of reasons to believe it'll be a fine entry into the mockumentary canon; it's directed by Jake Kasdan, co-written by the red-hot Judd Apatow, and stars the talented and eminently likable John C. Reilly (as well as a boatload of potentially amusing guest stars, including Jack White as Elvis, Frankie Muniz as Buddy Holly, and, as the Beatles, Jack Black, Paul Rudd, Justin Long, and Jason Schwartzman!).  We figured it might be a good time to bring up some of our other favorite pseudo-documentaries, and, as an extra challenge, do it without mentioning any of the films of a certain Mr. Christopher Guest.  (To top it all off, I'm not even going to discuss Albert Brooks' amazing Real Life.  Well, except right then.)

THE RUTLES: ALL YOU NEED IS CASH (1978)

Yes, Screengrab readers, there actually was a time when goofing on the Beatles wasn't the most played-out thing a human being could do!  That time was about thirty years ago, when Monty Python alum Eric Idle penned, starred in, and co-directed this made-for-TV movie about the rise and decline of the Prefab Four, the most famous band ever to come out of Rutland. George Harrison liked it enough to funnel some money into producing the film, even though he's savagely parodied as Stig O'Hara, the group's dullest member, who doesn't appear to speak any English, accidentally sues himself, and is eventually replaced by a wax dummy. It features a few other Python members as well as some Not-Ready-for-Prime-Time SNL alums — the only filmed collaboration between the two groups — and as such, contains more than its share of hilarious dialogue and situations. What really elevates it above the level of standard rock 'n' roll pseudo-documentary is the music, written entirely by co-star (and former Bonzo Dog Band front man) Neil Innes. The songs so closely resemble Beatles originals that it's easy to miss the absurdly funny lyrics.

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