Brian, 23

www.youtube.com/BrianDFreedman

How has abstinence added to your sexuality?
Withholding my urge to boink has increased my sexuality dramatically. Anytime you have to say "no thanks" because you have a higher goal in mind, it builds internal fortitude. So, constantly denying sex has made me extremely confident in my sexuality. I own it now.  

What is the greatest myth about people who choose abstinence?
That they are religious and only doing it for God. I don't attend church, though I am spiritual. Why am I abstaining? I'm doing it for me and for her (my future girlfriend). I only want to be with that one woman who's worth it. Aside from that, I'm restraining myself in order to grow stronger as a person.

Sometimes the idea of getting a break from my boyfriend's libido sounds like Heaven. What is the best reason to date someone who has sworn off sex?
They like you for you. It can be hard for women to know if a man wants them for them or what they can give them, but when you know he doesn't want what is between your legs, he has no hidden agenda — he genuinely likes you! And after a couple years, all the emotional connection and built-up sexual energy makes the first time the best sex you've ever had.

My roommate and my good friend were dating, and they recently broke up. As the man in the middle, how do I handle the situation delicately?
Just be there for both of your friends. If either one asks you to side with them and ignore the other, that's messed up. Just because they don't like each other any more, doesn't mean you have to stop liking one or the other. Honestly, now that I think about it, staying out of it might be the best decision you make. Still be friends with both of them and respect each of their feelings, but make it clear to both parties you are not a messenger to convey hate mail between the two.

What's the best way to introduce my ultra-conservative family to my tattooed, vegan girlfriend? I think they'd get along great, but I'm worried about these first impressions getting in the way.
Invite her over for a dinner that has plenty for her to eat. Go through most of the night before mentioning she's a vegan. It's easy to see vegans as people who eat basically nothing, so if she looks normal eating food with the rest of the family when they don't know she's vegan, she will be perceived as normal. As for the tats, have her dress in something long sleeved to cover up as many as possible. The important thing is to let your family actually get to know her before they have a chance to judge.

I lied to a girl I've been seeing about my job; I was embarrassed to say I just worked a register. We've been seeing each other for over a month now — how should I come clean?
Just do it. Yes, you lied. Tell her the truth, and why you lied. You were afraid she wouldn't want to be with a man who worked at a register, which shows just how much you devalued yourself to nothing more than the work you do. She's dating the man behind the register.