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Date Machine: Prostitutes - Yay or nay?

Posted by airheadgenius

 

 

I have an email buddy who has mentioned a couple times in our correspondence that he uses prostitutes and escorts.
We've never met but photographic evidence suggests that he is attractive and our emails lead me to believe that he is reasonably well off, responsible and quite entertaining. I am sure there's baggage, but there are no immediate indicators that make me think he couldn't get a girlfriend if he wanted one.

Clearly he wants to get laid and using an escort/prostitute means he is on a promise and doesn't have to try very hard, if at all. Finding a girlfriend involves speculation and the risk of rejection, plus ultimately the chance to not get laid.

I have mixed feelings about the, supposed, oldest profession. A part of me thinks why not? It is simply fulfilling a market need. But part of me feels that it's just laziness on the part of the procurer and that they simply can't be bothered to invest the time or energy in courting a partner. Plus, I think it's likely that the judgement made on a woman paying a male escort would be much more negative than a man paying a woman, so that just pisses me off on principle. Plus, a woman would presumably find it harder to make that transaction in the first place given that "the norm" is for men to be seeking out female prostitutes.

Another friend ventured that it's all about choice and so he doesn't have a problem with it. But it really isn't about choice if you are female - you only have to peruse the back pages of The Voice to know it's yet another male dominated domain. Also, the women on the low end of the prostitute spectrum - the whores rather than the high class escorts - may not have much choice in the matter to begin with.

Even if the entire market was run fairly, prostitutes were paid reasonably and had decent working conditions etc etc, I still feel that it would encourage people to be lazy and to avoid taking emotional risks. It's like ordering take out every night instead of going to the supermarket and then preparing a meal. The former being a quick fix solution which costs more money and is ultimately bad for your health.

My bottom line is that I wouldn't feel comfortable in the company of someone I was having to pay to show up.

How do you feel about it Date Machiners?
Prostitutes - yay or nay?

Here are some I made earlier:
The female orgasm
Fabulous at 40, the reprise
Slim, petite or average?
Losing Momentum
How do you get ready for a date?
I need you
Heartache or just another real estate opportunity?

 

 This is a Hot Man Trivet. Sexy huh?

 

 


+ DIGG + DEL.ICIO.US + REDDIT

Comments

flintsteel said:

The takeout analogy is a good one. Include eating in restaurants and you expand it to cover the difference between incall and outcall as well. Hookers are very cut and dried, the experience ends when they/you walk out the door. Like someone said:"you pay them to leave."

"Finding a girlfriend involves speculation and the risk of rejection, plus ultimately the chance to not get laid." THAT is the easy (also fun) part of girlfriends. After one marriage, several multiple year relationships, too many to count relationships of some duration (basically 40 years of relationships-good, bad, dramatic) the simplicity of hookers has some appeal.

Plus it is something new. I quit doing drugs years ago and I found that one of the things I missed was the intrigue involved in copping. It was risky business for sure and I enjoyed it. Learning how to meet and employ escorts was a similar new world that took some effort to learn about.

As to "My bottom line is that I wouldn't feel comfortable in the company of someone I was having to pay to show up." These girls offer "GFE" or "girl friend experience" which doesn't mean they bitch at you or pout, it means they act like they like you. They want your money and they will work hard for it.

Some are flakes. Some are not. One girl I know is a grad student, another has a Masters in something, mostly they seem nice enough. I've actually become friends with a couple of them (we go to movies).

I've pretty much stopped seeing them professionally because ultimately the sex is boring.

As to the availability of male escorts, I am sure if there was a demand it would be filled.........

March 26, 2009 3:16 PM

airheadgenius said:

"As to the availability of male escorts, I am sure if there was a demand it would be filled........."

We live in a patriarchy. There is a demand for affordable day care - it has not been filled. There is a demand for flexible working conditions for mothers. That demand has not been filled either. We have, however, got really good at creating pills to give aging men lasting erections. They may or may not use them on prostitutes.

March 26, 2009 4:25 PM

florentinoariza said:

It's been so long, but I'm happy to be drawn back in with this scintillating short.  I'm surprised not to see much discourse.  Perhaps it's an "it is what it is" situation...?

March 26, 2009 5:30 PM

flintsteel said:

Not to be wiseass but do you think that the reason there are no male escorts for hetero females is because of Republicans? OK, too late, I was a wiseass.

I suspect that the reason for the double standard is the same as the reason that there are boner pills and no feminine counterpart. Male and female desire are different (which is way beyond my typing skills).

You are right we do live in a male dominated society which is one of the reasons it is so fucked up........

March 26, 2009 6:22 PM

recycledbrooklyn said:

There are lots of male escorts. They mostly service men, often men whose wives are home taking care of the kids.  Nice, right?

I'm with you on this.  No desire to be a part of it.  

March 26, 2009 7:02 PM

dvaleriey said:

I find men who frequent prostitutes revolting, but have had a fantasy or two about making a buck off these revolting cads.  Naturally it is some absurd Miss Kitty saloon scenario in a traditional boom-town brothel that no longer exists.  I don't really daydream about the sex, but imagine wearing a pair of bloomers with a disheveled Gibson hairdo lazily counting bills while some gold-rush cowboy pulls his boots on.  Yay or Nay?  Nay, I say.  "Naaaay" say the horses outside my boudoir.  

March 26, 2009 8:16 PM

recycledbrooklyn said:

I think the most boring part about drugs, and a reason to quit in and of itself, is that conversation about drugs and the people that do them, is crashingly dull.  It's an incessant, repetitive, redundant drone.

That aside, I've got nothing against the idea of prostitution in and of itself, but it cannot be denied that it's a horrible industry and is dominated by human traffic, desperation and violence, mostly against women and children.  That it has been glamorized by apocryphal tales of high-priced escorts, and "liberated" middle class MBA candidates is really crass, and highly inaccurate overall.  The facts are in.  It is, for the most part, not just an honest transaction between consenting adults.  It's a scourge and could easily and accurately (mostly) defined as a hate crime.

March 27, 2009 6:11 AM

vix_en25 said:

Im with recycledbrooklyn on this. I think that another interesting question to ask is: is the legalization of prostitution a positive (these women are safer and get healthcare), or a negative thing (states become 'super-pimps', raking in tax money off of these poor women).

March 27, 2009 4:08 PM

smellynerd said:

I don't do practice it, because I know I'll become addicted the minute I start. I'll be a sad sad smelly nerd addicted to prostitutes.

March 27, 2009 11:00 PM

Toluca_86 said:

Fact is most prostitutes (no matter their level) view it as a job.  If they're good, they pretend to like the guy and like the sex.

Which says to me guys who visit them either

a) Are sort of naive and dumb OR

b) Just don't care what their sex partner is currently feeling

Neither of those are very attractive traits to me.

Oh, and a friend interned for the Prostitute Research Institute (or something like that) in San Fraancisco.  Basically, there is a lot of violence against prostitutes and most were abused as a child... it takes a certain kind of person to be able to disassociate from their body like that.

March 28, 2009 11:54 AM

KMA_Pyrokinetic said:

Women who have been with an excessive amount of partners is a turn off to me (not that my opinion matters)

March 28, 2009 8:44 PM

G_a_t_o_s said:

Most of the civilized world has legalized prostitution, of course.  Here the suburban wives who are, when the peasant hypocricy is stripped away, nothing but prostitutes on a state sanctioned long term contract, fight to keep it illegal as a guild matter, they do not want the competition from more economical providers who provide a better product.  Prostitution is no more and no less demeaning than any other sale of services.  I don't avail myself, because even the retail prostitute charges more than I care to spend for mere sex, but I am glad that it is available for those that want it.  Those countries where it is legal have, as a rule, a much lower incidence of the kinds of Ted Bundy, Jeffrey Dahmer activity that our ludicrous repressions engender.

March 29, 2009 1:35 PM

Toluca_86 said:

G_a_t_o_s,

Some of the places where it is legal still see very high rates of violence aimed at prostitutes... a lot more determines how ethical the industry is besides simply whether it's legal or not.

Also, how many prostitutes/sex workers have you spoken to about their experiences, eh?  I'm guessing none.

March 29, 2009 7:28 PM

recycledbrooklyn said:

Gatos, I think if you look at the facts you will find that there are very very few places around the globe where prostitution is legal.  Furthermore, even in the places where the sex trade IS legal, the women and men involved come from the most desperately disadvantaged social classes.  On top of that (!!!!) while prostitution is legal, so is indentured servitude of sorts, and many of the prostitutes are MINORS!!!!  WTF, DUDE??? ARE YOU KIDDING ME???  Where do you get your information?  A huge percentage of prostitutes and sex workers around the globe would best be defined as victims.  I am about as far from puritanical as a man could be described, but seriously... you are dreadfully misinformed.  There is nothing at all honest or honorable about the industry.  It's run by creeps with little to no regard for human life.  

Is there hypocrisy concerning the laws against it?  You bet there is, BECAUSE THEY PUNISH THE VICTIMS.  THEY PUNISH THE WOMEN AND BOYS WHO ARE FORCED INTO IT!!!  And you think this is driven by enraged jealous housewives?  What color is the sky in your world???

March 29, 2009 10:10 PM

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