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Personals Drama: The sexiest man alive! aka More Naked Photos

Posted by airheadgenius

Today, I varnished the staircases and then, admittedly a little giddy from the polyurethane fumes, decided to check out the newest members on the sex machine that is hooksexup.com

I wish I could post the real photo here, but suffice it to say that this one is freakishly similar, albeit less hairy:

 

Here's the profile: (he declined to divulge his height and body type from the get go, but then announced it in his charming little description of himself)

"When i see a good looking woman I dream about taking her close off.An having my way with her night an day. I am 5'5 165lbs an horn as hell.....love fishing,camping,hiking an making love in the car after a long ride in the car"

Ladies, form an orderly queue please.

 

Here are some I made earlier:
Naked Photos
Ever decreasing circles - have you dated the same men as me?
Way too much information
ahg, zeit, ambo threesome plus booty calls
Is this thing on? Does anyone find love on Hooksexup?
Do you attract douchebags?
Jaded or pragmatic?
Let down badly by an Englishman

 

 

Now on to my Daily Knob: I should've been seeing him live tomorrow night if a) my friends weren't so lame and b) he hadn't cancelled.

This song was, of course, written entirely for me

 

 

 




+ DIGG + DEL.ICIO.US + REDDIT
Posted Apr 23 2009, 02:55 PM
Filed under: , , ,

Comments

vix_en25 said:

mmmmmm break me off a piece of that!

now seriously:

EW.

April 23, 2009 3:27 PM

zeroaccess said:

I like the "having my way with her after the car ride"- it means he plans nice things for his girl.

April 23, 2009 5:55 PM

obesely morbid said:

He probably likes "making love in the car after a long ride in the car" because it's much too much effort to extricate himself from the car.

I'll wager you're not aware that your "fat man" graphic is actually Futurama's Bender the robot, from the "What-if Machine" episode in which he becomes human.  I don't see you as a Futurama fan.

And did anyone else think for a moment that "varnishing the staircases" was some quaint British euphemism?

April 23, 2009 10:52 PM

obesely morbid said:

Okay, I saw the "horny as hell" tag and now realize that "varnishing" WAS a euphemism.  I was simply thrown off by my reflexive visualization of the geometry of a staircase.  I suppose I should have visualized a SPIRAL staircase.

April 23, 2009 10:58 PM

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