Ladies and Gentlemen, I come before you to admit that I have never felt the embrace of a lover. I have never breathed deep of masculinity, reveled in the wrap of sun-bronzed arms oiled lightly by sweet perspiration. I have never had the words "I love you" spoken gently in my ear, giving me cause to shiver as if...um...some spider metaphor...
Ha ha, okay. I am loved. But I have never played a Prince of Persia game. Not one. I am the 28-year-old Prince of Persia virgin.
I know this is shocking and I'll understand if you don't want to be my friend anymore. Please believe me when I say that I intend to make things right, though. There are certain things in this life that no one should die without experiencing. "Play Prince of Persia" has always been in the back of my head-queue, though admittedly I've become doubly curious since I learned it's one of a precious few franchises that game critic Yahtzee loves. Every games writer wants to grow up to be Yahtzee. I personally dig the hat.
I also have to admit I'm impressed by the trailer for the new-gen Prince of Persia, so I guess I'll excuse myself and go apply some perfume and check my dowry.
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