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Talking to Strangers

Hooksexup asks deeply personal questions to people we just met.




Clevins, 21

What do you do for a living?
Right now, I'm a sales associate at Abercrombie and Fitch. But aside from that, I'm a writer.

Which of those jobs gets you more play?
There are a lot of attractive women at Abercrombie and Fitch, but if I'm at a party, or have a new project coming out, women are actually attracted to the fact that I'm a writer.

Do you have any favorite hookup stories?
I was an extra in a European beer commercial last year. I met this girl there who had a really serious face, so it was really hard for me even to think about approaching her. After the shoot, they gave us an unlimited supply of beer, so I just drank and drank and drank. Later, we both got on to the F train. We started talking and started to feel comfortable, so I was no longer the weird drunk guy, and I got her phone number. We're not dating anymore, but we still talk. And this one time I had sex in a public spot —

What kind of public spot?
York Street, the F train station.

In the station?
Yeah. It was the wintertime, and she had this really long Prada jacket covering us, so people would just think we were making out. But we were literally doing it in the station.

On one of the benches?
No, deep in the back, near the pillars. I was really paranoid, thinking I was going to get caught, so... how can I put this? I just wasn't as excited as I should have been. She thought I wasn't into her, but it's hard to concentrate when you have people all around you. It's not you, it's the rush hour!




Kiki, 30

You just got to New York?
I moved here three months ago, almost to the day, from Portland, Oregon.

How are Portland boys different from New York boys?
Oh my God. So different. North of L.A., by twenty-seven, everyone is married, engaged, seriously dating. Here, everyone is still single, but there are a lot more total douchebags. There are lots of douchebags in L.A., too, but here, the guys you meet are just like... good lord. Everyone works for a hedge fund. What does that even mean?

Have you ever been offended in the bedroom?
I feel like every girl has. Guys have a way of making you feel like you're not really that special girl. I remember this one guy, he was like, "I just love having a girl in my bed." He should have said, "I love having you in my bed."

What did you do?
We kept having sex, and I left in the morning.

Do you have any favorite hook-up stories?
There was this guy who was the love of my life in high school. We dated off and on all throughout high school, and then we went to the same college. When I got there, he was a junior and I was a freshman. He was in a fraternity. I was in a sorority. My freshman year, we had sex in the corner of a dance floor.

How did you make that happen?
I was a freshman, and I was in love.

No, I mean, short skirt? I want logistics here.
Short skirt. There was a really, really, really dirty mattress on the ground. It was disgusting. I had these ridiculous platform heels on.

Did you wear them while you were...
Yeah. Then I stood up to put my underwear back on, tripped on my ridiculous platforms, and fell on the dance floor face-first.

Were your panties around your heels?
Yes.

Did your man at least help you up?
I don't know. He was an idiot. About a year ago, he called me up to tell me he was engaged and that this was my last chance to marry him.




Lisanette, 25

What do you do for a living?
I'm a legal assistant.

What do you look for in a guy?
Um, I look for intelligence and someone I can relate to. Similar interests. I think looks go into it — like, I tend to go for guys with long hair.

Oh my God, it's the opposite for me.
Oh man, the longer the better. Well, I mean, it's gotta be well-maintained.

Maybe I just haven't seen well-maintained hair yet.
True enough!

Do you have any dealbreakers?
Poor hygiene. Guys who can't carry on a semi-intelligent conversation about something that interests them.

What if all that interests them is the WWE?
Well, people have varying interests. I once dated this guy who was a mechanical engineer, and he could carry on an intelligent conversation, but I was like, "I have no idea what you're talking about. Stop spewing math equations at me!"

Have you ever offended anyone in the bedroom?
There were a couple times where I was like, "Honey." It's the hygiene thing, you know. Some guys aren't aware of it.

Did you say something about it?
I did! I said, "Why don't we take this to the shower?" And he was like, "Why?" And I was like, "Because..."

"...your balls smell."
I mean, I didn't say it like that. I said it in so many words. "It's not so fresh, darling."


        


 

10 Comments

I'm torn between liking and disliking Sebastian's moustache. Love/hate.

Dee commented on 04/15

i say hate. or more like dislike.

emh commented on 04/15

Sebastian's really lazy and self-obsessed... his partners better like the submissive type.

kit commented on 04/15

sorry I should clarify; I don't mean at all that submissive people are lazy and self-obsessed. It's just that if you're lazy and self-obsessed when it comes to sex, you're probably not taking much initiative to do stuff for your partner, thus not the dominant type.

kit commented on 04/15

Hooray for a sista loving comic-reading martial artists! And for body-type diversity I guess...

abm commented on 04/15

Sebastian: see "asshole".

PO commented on 04/15

These are usually very entertaining. Not this time.

TB commented on 04/15

Sebastian does seem lazy - but also - totally the cutest of the bunch this time. No contest.

Tim commented on 04/15

I appreciated that Hooksexup found more normal people and not those glamorous skinny hipster types. Good on ya.

Joe commented on 04/15

ugh. i hated the "normal people." give mama something to look at.

tyb commented on 04/15
 

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"I just moved to this city and I had some guy ask to bite me."
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"If they'd opened the door, it would have been the most awkward situation in my life."
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"At the same point I realize that what was holding the door open was the ladder..."
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