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61 Frames Per Second

Flying Gay Men Invade Virtual Console!

Posted by Bob Mackey

The Cho Aniki series of aggressively-gay horizontal shooters has always been easy joke fodder; for about three or four years in a row, a Cho Aniki screenshot/caption tag-team appeared in nearly every issue of EGM. Through the march of time, Boong-Ga Boong-Ga has since replaced Cho Aniki in the "Oh, those wacky foreigners" category, but we've never been graced with an American release of any Cho Aniki game...until today.

The VC still lack Earthbound, Majora's Mask, and Yoshi's Island, but today Nintendo decided to rectify the dearth of TG-16 shmups on their digital download service by releasing the first Cho Aniki game. I can't tell you if it's good or bad, but I can tell you that it's weird.

Everything I know about the Japanese view of homosexuality is based on portrayals of gays in Japanese media, which boils down to the stereotype of male homosexuals being buff bodybuilders (with a surprising lack of mustache), and that the mere presense of gays is a joke in and of itself. A still image of Will and Grace would probably be considered the height of humor in Japan.

Remarkably, the first game in the Cho Aniki series could be much gayer--and it's important to note that the franchise would get much, much gayer. There's almost an exponential increase in over the top--and many would say insulting--gayness as the series continued, which makes me think this might be the only Cho Aniki game released for the Virtual Console.  The breakout stars of Cho Aniki--bodybuilding brothers Adol and Samson--are relegated to the meager role of Gradius-style options in the first game; yes, they're Speedo-clad men firing laser beams out of their head.  I told you this game was weird.

Hardcore Gaming 101 (as usual) has an excellent write-up on the series in case you need a brief refresher, or a reason to spend 900 Wii Points. Personally, when it comes to humorous shooters, I'm waiting for Parodius. It's not that my sexuality is being threatened--I just find the idea of controlling a penguin a little more attractive than a greasy, grinning bodybuilder. They scare me in real life.

Related Links:

Sweet Sassy Molassey! Super Mario RPG on the Virtual Console
The Dividing RPG: Secret of Mana
Ys and You


+ DIGG + DEL.ICIO.US + REDDIT

Comments

Roto13 said:

I downloaded it. I'm kind of disappointed with just how gay this game isn't. The rest of the games in the series are full of hilarious homoeroticism, but a few levels in the only things I see in Cho Aniki are the great brothers themselves.

There's definitely enough weirdness to go around, though.

September 8, 2008 8:54 PM

LBD "Nytetrayn" said:

Someone tell me why we can't have Captain Rainbow here, again?  Please?

September 9, 2008 2:03 AM

Roto13 said:

Because of the vibrator. :P

September 9, 2008 12:40 PM

Derrick Sanskrit said:

Maybe its just because we're a gaming blog on a sex magazine, but I want Captain Rainbow even more now. I hope there's some wiimote thrusting involved in Crazy Tracy's enslavement of mankind.

September 9, 2008 5:35 PM

About Bob Mackey

For a brief period of time I was Bull from TV's Night Court, but some of you may know me from the humor column I wrote for Youngstown State University's The Jambar, Kent State University's The Stater, and Youngstown's alternative newspaper, The Walruss. I'm perhaps most well-known for my bi-weekly pieces on Something Awful. I've also blogged for Valley24.com and have written articles for EGM, 1UP, GameSpite and Cracked. For all of my writing over the years, I have made a total of twenty American dollars. It's also said that I draw cartoons, which people have described with words such as "legible." I kidnapped the Lindbergh Baby and am looking to do so again in the future.

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John Constantine, our superhero, was raised by birds and then attended Penn State University. He is currently working on a novel about a fictional city that exists only in his mind. John has an astonishingly extensive knowledge of Scientology. Ultimately he would like to learn how to effectively use his brain. He continues to keep Wu-Tang's secret to himself.

Derrick Sanskrit is a self-professed geek in a variety of fields including typography, graphic design, comic books, music and cartoons. As a professional hipster graphic designer, his recent clients have included Hooksexup, Pitchfork and MoCCA, among others.

Amber Ahlborn - artist, writer, gamer and DigiPen survivor, she maintains a day job as a graphic artist. By night Amber moonlights as a professional Metroid Fanatic and keeps a metal suit in the closet just in case. Has lived in the state of Washington and insists that it really doesn't rain as much as everyone says it does.

Nadia Oxford is a housekeeping robot who was refurbished into a warrior when the world's need for justice was great. Now that the galaxy is at peace (give or take a conflict here or there), she works as a freelance writer for various sites and magazines. Based in Toronto, Nadia's prized possession is a certificate from the Ministry of Health declaring her tick and rabies-free.

Bob Mackey is a grad student, writer, and cyborg, who uses the powerful girl-repelling nanomachines mad science grafted onto his body to allocate time towards interests of the nerd persuasion. He believes that complaining about things on the Internet is akin to the fine art of wine tasting, but with more spitting into buckets.

Joe Keiser has a programming degree from Johns Hopkins University, a tiny apartment in Brooklyn, and a fake toy guitar built in the hollowed-out shell of a real guitar. He writes about games and technology for a variety of outlets. One day he will stop doing this. The day after that, police will find his body under a collapsed pile of (formerly neatly alphabetized) collector's edition tchotchkes.

Cole Stryker is an American freelance writer living in York, England, where he resides with his archeologist wife. He writes for a travel company by day and argues about pop culture on the internet by night. Find him writing regularly here and here.

Peter Smith is like the lead character of Irwin Shaw's The 80-Yard Run, except less athletic. He considers himself very lucky to have this job. But it's a little premature to take "jack-off of all trades" off his resume. Besides writing, travelling, and painting houses, Pete plays guitar in a rock trio called The Aye-Ayes. He calls them a 'power pop' band, but they generally sound more like Motorhead on a drinking binge.


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