Posted by Bob Mackey
Today's Virtual Console release of Mega Man 2 reminded me of the time I naively planned to play through all of the Mega Man games in order through the then-new Anniversary Collection. I miraculously made it through most of the first game--which is pretty damn tough--only to be stopped in my tracks by that asshole on the right. Yes, thanks to the Yellow Devil, I will never know the sweet, sweet joy that comes with finishing our blue hero's inaugural adventure. Please do not describe the endorphin rush, for it would only make me sad.
Here's a video if you need a reminder of my pain. I no longer possess the reflexes to beat this monstrosity--if I ever had them to begin with:
As much as I like retro games, there are certain things about them like our friend the Yellow Devil that try my patience and make me say "no more." At the risk of being called "weaksauce," I know my limits. With the first Mega Man, those limits were clearly embodied in a cheap boss (never mind that the video above makes him look incredibly easy) in which I would have to invest hours of muscle-memory training. But it isn't just the ravages of age that are keeping me from games that I'd honestly like to replay. I've had the intention of having another go at Final Fantasy VIII ever since my first playthrough of the game back in 1999, but the threat of something so slow and dated in a distinctly 32-bit era kind of way keeps me at bay.
So where does your logical, rational mind draw the line when it comes to retro? Are there certain things you cannot--or will not--do, despite your love for games of the past? I think it's healthy to know your limits, even if they do make you a little sad inside.
Related Links:
Mega Man 9 Goes Back To Your Roots. Way Back.
The Delights of Continuity in Mega Man and Abroad
The Ten Greatest Classic Mega Man Levels, Part 1
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About Bob Mackey
For a brief period of time I was Bull from TV's
Night Court, but some of you may know me from the humor column I wrote for Youngstown State University's The Jambar, Kent State University's The Stater, and Youngstown's alternative newspaper, The Walruss. I'm perhaps most well-known for my bi-weekly pieces on Something Awful. I've also blogged for Valley24.com and have written articles for EGM, 1UP, GameSpite and Cracked. For all of my writing over the years, I have made a total of twenty American dollars. It's also said that I draw cartoons, which people have described with words such as "legible." I kidnapped the Lindbergh Baby and am looking to do so again in the future.
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