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61 Frames Per Second

Klonoa's Truimphant(?) Return

Posted by Bob Mackey

Klonoa: Door to Phantomile, a mostly-forgotten mascot platformer for the PSX, may be far less forgotten in the not-too-distant future. 1UP reports that the first--and admittedly, best--Klonoa game will see new life on the Wii in a fully-refurbished remake this December, which is great news--for Japan, anyway. Not only will this remake excise the game's lousy pre-rendered sprites; everyone who missed Namco's mascot of indeterminate species back in 1997 will finally get a chance to see why they should regret all of their decade-old mistakes.

Here's a video of the original game in action, lest we've forgotten:



I've always held a bit of disappointment in my heart for the general failure of the Klonoa series; despite the furry trappings, the first game was a whimsical adventure with a seemingly contrary bittersweet--and slightly depressing--tone. And the economy of effective storytelling fit in well with the game's deceptively-simple puzzle-platforming mechanics; Klonoa is a solid little game, and very similar to the 8-bit 2D platformers that undoubtedly inspired it.  Unfortunately, the series was launched at a time when 2D vs. 3D was a common argument, back before people realized they could live together--kinda like Ebony and Ivory (ask your parents).

We can only hope that the Klonoa remake comes out here--and hopefully, without any Wii-mote gimmicks. I'd hate to see the elegant simplicity of the game ruined by excessive waggling. And who knows; maybe this remake will spark a Klonoa revival? The only thing to say to that is "Doopa-loo-doo."

Once again, ask your parents.

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Comments

Amber Ahlborn said:

I own this game and its excellent PS2 sequel.  A remake of the first one sounds awesome.  I second the motion for a US release.  Oh, and I do believe that Klonoa's species is "Cabbit".

October 1, 2008 3:06 PM

John Constantine said:

I am freaking out over this announcement. Klonoa 1 remains in my top five all time favorite games and, while I'd prefer a proper sequel, it's great to see this game get a new chance at life. All I know is that the better keep the story intact. It is so delightfully bizarre, sad, and beautiful.

October 1, 2008 3:29 PM

Nemo Incognito said:

I am tentatively ecstatic about this.  I would actually be happier if it was being advertised as a 'port' instead of a 'remake' because I can't think of much you could do to enhance the game.  There might be the temptation to cram in more features and destroy the game's simple appeal.  If they just updated it with the Klonoa 2 engine and kept the music/direction/text the same I will be 'Wahoo!'

October 1, 2008 3:49 PM

Nadia Oxford said:

I've never played Klonoa, and now I will get to. Hooray!

October 1, 2008 3:49 PM

Nick Daniel said:

I think I remember someone in the first game refering to Klonoa's people as mice (maybe wind mice).

Also you're right about wiimote gimmicks, they could only stand to ruin the perfectly balanced gameplay. The only thing I want to see them change about Klonoa is the addition of more Balue's chamber stages.

October 1, 2008 4:00 PM

John Constantine said:

Nick Daniel, you are a genius. Bring on the extra hardcore platforming challenges, stat.

October 1, 2008 4:49 PM

John Constantine said:

Spoiler warning here. Also, nerd warning. More like a nerd red alert.

Not sure if this was ever explicitly laid out, but I don't think we ever find out exactly what Klonoa is species wise. He is, after all, just a dreamer inhabiting a Cabbits body.

October 1, 2008 4:51 PM

Bob Mackey said:

I think a common theme in the Klonoa games is "Klonoa keeps getting dicked over by the universe."

October 1, 2008 5:05 PM

Nick Daniel said:

I did a wiki search to see if I could confirm just what Klonoa is, and I came across this tidbit: There was a Klonoa manga.

klonoafanclub.net/.../viewtopic.php

October 1, 2008 6:04 PM

Nemo Incognito said:

I know what Klonoa really is.  I found out there is a real answer but I don't think I could ever spoil it in an open thread like this.  Partly because it spoils the ending but mostly because once you know it you can never un-know it and it really changes how you see at the series...

October 1, 2008 6:06 PM

John Constantine said:

You must spill the beans, Nemo. The world must know.

October 1, 2008 6:16 PM

Nemo Incognito said:

Not in the comments.  I swear I'm not usually this reverent but it really does feel like forbidden knowledge sometimes.

If I send it to the email address under the profiles will it go to all the writers?

October 1, 2008 6:53 PM

John Constantine said:

Hit me at johnc at Hooksexup dot com, Nemo. Where does this forbidden fruit come from, Klonoa Heroes? Namco X Capcom? I've only played Door to Phantomile, 2, the GBA puzzle-platformers, and Volleyball.

October 1, 2008 7:51 PM

Amber Ahlborn said:

John, you'd better pass that tidbit of info on to me.  I couldn't care less about what celebrities do but I wanna know about Klonoa's dark past!

October 1, 2008 9:09 PM

About Bob Mackey

For a brief period of time I was Bull from TV's Night Court, but some of you may know me from the humor column I wrote for Youngstown State University's The Jambar, Kent State University's The Stater, and Youngstown's alternative newspaper, The Walruss. I'm perhaps most well-known for my bi-weekly pieces on Something Awful. I've also blogged for Valley24.com and have written articles for EGM, 1UP, GameSpite and Cracked. For all of my writing over the years, I have made a total of twenty American dollars. It's also said that I draw cartoons, which people have described with words such as "legible." I kidnapped the Lindbergh Baby and am looking to do so again in the future.

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John Constantine, our superhero, was raised by birds and then attended Penn State University. He is currently working on a novel about a fictional city that exists only in his mind. John has an astonishingly extensive knowledge of Scientology. Ultimately he would like to learn how to effectively use his brain. He continues to keep Wu-Tang's secret to himself.

Derrick Sanskrit is a self-professed geek in a variety of fields including typography, graphic design, comic books, music and cartoons. As a professional hipster graphic designer, his recent clients have included Hooksexup, Pitchfork and MoCCA, among others.

Amber Ahlborn - artist, writer, gamer and DigiPen survivor, she maintains a day job as a graphic artist. By night Amber moonlights as a professional Metroid Fanatic and keeps a metal suit in the closet just in case. Has lived in the state of Washington and insists that it really doesn't rain as much as everyone says it does.

Nadia Oxford is a housekeeping robot who was refurbished into a warrior when the world's need for justice was great. Now that the galaxy is at peace (give or take a conflict here or there), she works as a freelance writer for various sites and magazines. Based in Toronto, Nadia's prized possession is a certificate from the Ministry of Health declaring her tick and rabies-free.

Bob Mackey is a grad student, writer, and cyborg, who uses the powerful girl-repelling nanomachines mad science grafted onto his body to allocate time towards interests of the nerd persuasion. He believes that complaining about things on the Internet is akin to the fine art of wine tasting, but with more spitting into buckets.

Joe Keiser has a programming degree from Johns Hopkins University, a tiny apartment in Brooklyn, and a fake toy guitar built in the hollowed-out shell of a real guitar. He writes about games and technology for a variety of outlets. One day he will stop doing this. The day after that, police will find his body under a collapsed pile of (formerly neatly alphabetized) collector's edition tchotchkes.

Peter Smith is like the lead character of Irwin Shaw's The 80-Yard Run, except less athletic. He considers himself very lucky to have this job. But it's a little premature to take "jack-off of all trades" off his resume. Besides writing, travelling, and painting houses, Pete plays guitar in a rock trio called The Aye-Ayes. He calls them a 'power pop' band, but they generally sound more like Motorhead on a drinking binge.


CONTRIBUTORS

Cole Stryker is an American freelance writer living in York, England, where he resides with his archeologist wife. He writes for a travel company by day and argues about pop culture on the internet by night. Find him writing regularly here and here.

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