Posted by Bob Mackey
Most of you out there are probably playing Chrono Trigger DS--or at least you should be. I have to admit that I'm a total hypocrite, though; if I do play through Chrono Trigger again, it's not going to be for a while. Listen, when you suffer through hours upon hours of Chrono's abysmal PSX port to unlock some pretty pedestrian bonus content, you need to take a little break. I'll be at the five year mark around springtime, so please look forward to my coverage of Chrono Trigger DS in April 2009.
Believe it or not, there are versions of Chrono far worse than the PSX port, which was like playing a beloved RPG while immersed in quicksand. Our industrious friends in China actually produced their own pirate Famicom version of the game, as they've done in the past with many other games that have no business being on an 8-bit platform. Maybe this video will show you why:
Diagnosis: adorable--in a "broken toy on a thrift store shelf" sort of way. If you can get past the horribly mangled loop of "Peaceful Days" playing in the background, that is. Unfortunately, this video doesn't consist of more than a lot of walking around, which is making me wonder just how much of Chrono Trigger this cheap knockoff copies. I'm tempted to become completely literate in Chinese just to see what an 8-bit Zeal looks like. I guess that'll give me something to do during my retirement.
Related Links:
Adding a Thirteenth to Twelve Delicious Flavors: Chrono Trigger DS’ New Ending
The Weakest Link: Chrono Trigger and Chrono Cross
OST: Chrono Cross
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About Bob Mackey
For a brief period of time I was Bull from TV's
Night Court, but some of you may know me from the humor column I wrote for Youngstown State University's The Jambar, Kent State University's The Stater, and Youngstown's alternative newspaper, The Walruss. I'm perhaps most well-known for my bi-weekly pieces on Something Awful. I've also blogged for Valley24.com and have written articles for EGM, 1UP, GameSpite and Cracked. For all of my writing over the years, I have made a total of twenty American dollars. It's also said that I draw cartoons, which people have described with words such as "legible." I kidnapped the Lindbergh Baby and am looking to do so again in the future.
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