Posted by Bob Mackey
Barring some sort of life-altering world crisis, Mega Man 9 should be available on the Wii's Shopping Channel at this very moment. That's right; a new official Mega Man game now exists in the universe. What did you do to deserve this? Probably nothing; but I'm sure you have 10 bucks, and that certainly makes up for all of the karma.
If you don't own a Wii, you're going to have to wait a few excruciating and interminable days before you can download Mega Man 9 on your XBox 360 or PS3. But if you really think about it, the Wii is the best platform for Mega Man 9--and this has absolutely nothing to do with the typical snide commentary about the comparatively lackluster graphics of Nintendo's console. Out of the big three home systems, only the Wii has a controller befitting of Mega Man's 2-D legacy.
To be fair, both Microsoft and Sony are kind of hamstrung by Nintendo's patent on the cross-shaped directional-pad. Sony came up with a functional and creative solution to this problem, but it still pales into comparison to Nintendo's standby. And as for Microsoft, the 360's d-pad looks like someone melted two grey gummy bears onto the controller; this made Bionic Commando: Rearmed much more irritating than the developers intended. I'm desperately trying not to sound like a shill here, but there's still nothing better for 2-D gaming than Nintendo's d-pad.
Achievement Whores may be tempted to wait until the XBox Live Arcade release, which is exactly why Mega Man 9 is an acid test for Achievement Whoredom. If you desperately want to increase your gamerscore, you're going to have to wait until October 1st. October. That's an entirely different month. And just look at these achievements. Is this what you want to do with your life?
In closing, I wish to thank you for showing enough restraint to sit and read this entire blog post. Now go off and buy Mega Man 9 like the excitable little monkeys you are.
Related Links:
Mega Man 2 Vs. Mega Man 3: The Eternal Battle for Everlasting Peace
Mega Man 9 Goes Back To Your Roots. Way Back.
Mega Man 9 Bosses Look Like Mega Man Bosses
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About Bob Mackey
For a brief period of time I was Bull from TV's
Night Court, but some of you may know me from the humor column I wrote for Youngstown State University's The Jambar, Kent State University's The Stater, and Youngstown's alternative newspaper, The Walruss. I'm perhaps most well-known for my bi-weekly pieces on Something Awful. I've also blogged for Valley24.com and have written articles for EGM, 1UP, GameSpite and Cracked. For all of my writing over the years, I have made a total of twenty American dollars. It's also said that I draw cartoons, which people have described with words such as "legible." I kidnapped the Lindbergh Baby and am looking to do so again in the future.
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