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Puerile Pure: Disney Racer’s Profanity Revealed

Posted by Joe Keiser

This one is almost too good to be true, but here it is: the typically smart Quarter to Three forums have revealed that the PC version of Disney’s entertaining racer Pure comes with…curse words. Long lists of curse words. Long lists of curse words in seven languages.

The other forum posters have alleged that this is probably Disney’s standard profanity filter, inexplicably stripped and left naked in Pure’s file structure for all to see. They also hypothesize that this is an enormous ESRB no-no, which is true and could make this a ticking time bomb of controversy: you’ll recall that after that Hot Coffee fiasco any and all offensive on-disc content had to be revealed and rated.

And this certainly is offensive. I like to think that I know all kinds of amusing words, but Disney? Disney knows more. And if this really is the house of mouse’s profanity filter, I have to thank it for teaching me a variety of new and terrible vulgarity.

After the jump, some multi-cultural cursing. WARNING: contains cursing so multi-cultural I do not know how offensive most of it actually is.

Frottage: From the American list. This means like, friction? But erotic friction. Hubba hubba.

Anaaltourist: From the wonderful Dutch list. Because it’s a nice place to visit? Babelfish refuses to tell me what this actually means.

Aarsneuker: From the Dutch list, and again Babelfish has stonewalled me (and is probably calling my mom). Sounds explosive.

Slattern: From the American list? Really? It’s what they call prostitutes at the rest home.

Bilnaadpiraat: The Dutch list is my favorite list. Babelfish has finally played nice and explained that this is “buttock seam pirate,” saving me from another terrifying and fruitless Google Image Search.

And, finally:

Gay: Because a frank discussion of sexuality has no place in this off-road racing game, apparently. From the American list, natch.

I really could do this all day. Check out the forum here, click through to some of the lists, and make merry.

Related Links:

Screw Attack Remembers The Lion King; I Remember a 16-Bit Jungle Hell
Too Soon? No Nukes for Japanese Fallout 3
Editors, Where Are Your Manners?


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Comments

Roto13 said:

Frottage counts as a swear now? xP

December 9, 2008 4:37 PM

Demaar said:

Oh god, anaaltourist, that's hilarious. Thanks for the educational list, Disney!

December 13, 2008 1:34 PM

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John Constantine, our superhero, was raised by birds and then attended Penn State University. He is currently working on a novel about a fictional city that exists only in his mind. John has an astonishingly extensive knowledge of Scientology. Ultimately he would like to learn how to effectively use his brain. He continues to keep Wu-Tang's secret to himself.

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Joe Keiser has a programming degree from Johns Hopkins University, a tiny apartment in Brooklyn, and a fake toy guitar built in the hollowed-out shell of a real guitar. He writes about games and technology for a variety of outlets. One day he will stop doing this. The day after that, police will find his body under a collapsed pile of (formerly neatly alphabetized) collector's edition tchotchkes.

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