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Need For Speed is Hilarious: Return of the Live Action Cutscene

Posted by John Constantine

First, the tiny confession: I have never ever played a Need For Speed. I’m no racing fanatic, but I’m shocked I’ve managed to avoid them this long. I tend to play one racer obsessively every couple of years, a cycle that began with Rage Racer way back in, yes, 1998. (It actually came out in mid-’97, but I didn’t play it until a full year later, curious after reading previews for R4: Ridge Racer Type 4. That year really was awesome, wasn’t it?) The arcade-style delights of Ridge Racer are really what appeal to me in a racing game, something Need For Speed has in spades, so it’s surprising I’ve never played one of its fifteen different entries until this week. If Need For Speed: Undercover is anything to go by, I haven’t been missing much. The game’s something of a poor man’s Burnout: Paradise, giving you an open world to drive your licensed rides about but not letting you do much interesting inside of it. You can’t just stumble into races, you’ve got to select them from a menu or press down when driving near them, prompting load times and cutscenes. The driving is no great shakes, either, fast and presentable but with none of the edge of your seat spectacle that makes the aforementioned Burnout such a treat. I’m going to keep playing Need For Speed, though, for no other reason than to keep watching it’s hilarious live action cutscenes. Check out the goods a couple of minutes in:



Now that’s the kind of campy deliciousness that we haven’t seen since the halcyon days of Wing Commander. The weird color saturation in NFS’ scenes doesn’t quite compete with lumbering cat people, but it’s a close second. I have to wonder, though, why EA put the money into hiring these, ahem, actors. Yes, Maggie Q is a sexy spokesperson and all, but cutscenes with flesh and blood folks died with FMV games back in 1996. Have there always been live action scenes in NFS? Is EA trying to get post-modern with their franchise?

Second, and much bigger, confession: I have never ever played a real-time strategy game. It’s not that I’ve avoided them on purpose, it just happened somehow. Well, that’s all changing, because I am going to play the hell out of Command & Conquer: Red Alert 3. Why? Two words: Tim. Curry. I know that cheesy live action cutscenes have been a Command & Conquer staple, but I feel like I need to indulge in this new treasure trove. Look at this:



Curry’s accent here is almost as funny as the one he had in Congo.

EA, I am disappointed in you for disbanding Blueprint. But if you keep putting archaic nonsense like live action cutscenes in your games, I will forgive you.

So, reader? Thumbs up or thumbs down for live action cutscenes?

Related links:

A Decade of Gaming Excellence
Love-Hate: In Defense of the Cutscene
FMV Hell: Star Studded Casts - Do you Give a Crap?
Alternate Soundtrack: Need For Speed: Underground vs Justice's †


+ DIGG + DEL.ICIO.US + REDDIT

Comments

Demaar said:

Holy crap! Tim Curry! I dunno, I've always liked the dodgy FMV cut scenes in C&C. It felt kind of... right. NFS though, damn son, that crap is just lame.

A mate of mine was playing a recent NFS in front of his GF and she kept cracking jokes about how God damned cheesy it was, then made him turn the game off. As if gamers need another reason to feel awkward about their pass time.

C&C is never going to be displayed on public by its fans, but NFS is supposed to be "cool".

November 22, 2008 4:53 AM

Demaar said:

Holy crap! Tim Curry! I dunno, I've always liked the dodgy FMV cut scenes in C&C. It felt kind of... right. NFS though, damn son, that crap is just lame.

A mate of mine was playing a recent NFS in front of his GF and she kept cracking jokes about how God damned cheesy it was, then made him turn the game off. As if gamers need another reason to feel awkward about their pass time.

C&C is never going to be displayed on public by its fans, but NFS is supposed to be "cool".

November 22, 2008 4:55 AM

Nemo Incognito said:

I want to think live-action cutscenes could be a solution to the problem of the plastic-skinned, vacant-eyed computer modeled people that are the focus of many cutscenes nowadays.  The trouble here is, live-action cutscenes have a terrible reputation AND no-one seems to be able to do them well.

November 22, 2008 9:52 AM

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John Constantine, our superhero, was raised by birds and then attended Penn State University. He is currently working on a novel about a fictional city that exists only in his mind. John has an astonishingly extensive knowledge of Scientology. Ultimately he would like to learn how to effectively use his brain. He continues to keep Wu-Tang's secret to himself.

Derrick Sanskrit is a self-professed geek in a variety of fields including typography, graphic design, comic books, music and cartoons. As a professional hipster graphic designer, his recent clients have included Hooksexup, Pitchfork and MoCCA, among others.

Amber Ahlborn - artist, writer, gamer and DigiPen survivor, she maintains a day job as a graphic artist. By night Amber moonlights as a professional Metroid Fanatic and keeps a metal suit in the closet just in case. Has lived in the state of Washington and insists that it really doesn't rain as much as everyone says it does.

Nadia Oxford is a housekeeping robot who was refurbished into a warrior when the world's need for justice was great. Now that the galaxy is at peace (give or take a conflict here or there), she works as a freelance writer for various sites and magazines. Based in Toronto, Nadia prizes the certificate from the Ministry of Health declaring her tick and rabies-free.

Bob Mackey is a grad student, writer, and cyborg, who uses the powerful girl-repelling nanomachines mad science grafted onto his body to allocate time towards interests of the nerd persuasion. He believes that complaining about things on the Internet is akin to the fine art of wine tasting, but with more spitting into buckets.

Joe Keiser has a programming degree from Johns Hopkins University, a tiny apartment in Brooklyn, and a fake toy guitar built in the hollowed-out shell of a real guitar. He writes about games and technology for a variety of outlets. One day he will stop doing this. The day after that, police will find his body under a collapsed pile of (formerly neatly alphabetized) collector's edition tchotchkes.

Cole Stryker is an American freelance writer living in York, England, where he resides with his archeologist wife. He writes for a travel company by day and argues about pop culture on the internet by night. Find him writing regularly here and here.

Peter Smith is like the lead character of Irwin Shaw's The 80-Yard Run, except less athletic. He considers himself very lucky to have this job. But it's a little premature to take "jack-off of all trades" off his resume. Besides writing, travelling, and painting houses, Pete plays guitar in a rock trio called The Aye-Ayes. He calls them a 'power pop' band, but they generally sound more like Motorhead on a drinking binge.


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