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Where, Specifically, Did The Street Fighter Movie Go Wrong?

Posted by Nadia Oxford

 

Mere days remain until Street Fighter IV steals up and punches us in the backs of our heads. The online game community is quivering and stamping in anticipation, more or less the kind of behaviour that's acceptable amongst bucks in rut and restless Street Fighter fans.

I love the days that lead up to a big release, because all sorts of fun features and articles are published to fuel hype (and boost traffic, hey, it's not a sin). 1UP is celebrating Street Fighter IV's impending ascent to King of the Universe with The Greatest Scenes of Street Fighter: The Movie.

Of course, you already know the Street Fighter movie is horrible. You're just that hip and clever, right? Scott Sharkey's feature is still well worth a look, thanks to embedded video clips of the offending scenes. I've read more “Eww, gross” pieces about the Street Fighter movie than any sort of religious text, but this video-heavy take puts things in a new perspective for me. Namely, what was director Steven de Souza trying to do with this thing?

The Street Fighter movie isn't quite comedy, though God knows it's hilarious at points—intentionally and unintentionally. It's not exciting enough to be an action film, and it's certainly not a martial arts flick. It's some bastard swamp child, doomed to drift without a name or an identity or a loving touch. It's almost a shame because the film had the good sense not to take itself very seriously some of the time. Key problem: some of the time.

I almost want to say that legendary actor Raul Julia enjoyed the role of Bison, but he's an actor; he's paid to smile through the pain, and the poor guy was probably in a lot of pain by that stage in his life. In fact, Bison, Zangief, and Balrog are worth watching the movie for. The three play off each other like some kind of dystopian Three Stooges routine, and it's entertaining enough to watch (“I'm not getting paid enough for this.” “You're getting paid?”). Not that I would have wanted to dish out the full theatre price, but really, when you're directing a movie about a psychotic Dictator who wears puffy pants, there are only so many places you can take it, and all those places eventually spiral into Batshit Berg.

Shadaloo Silly Hour is contrasted very sharply against the struggles of Guile and the Allied Nations as they try to stop the realisation of Bison's “Bisonopolis” (City Hall is adorably shaped like a skull and wings). Guile is supposed to be an all-American badass. We're not supposed to laugh at him, but how else are we supposed to react to a heavily-accented, slurred declaration from Van Damme? Soldiers don't follow superiors who resolve to “keek that sunofabeesh Bison's ass SO HOIRD, dat dah next Bison wannabe is gonna feel et.” Van Damme (probably) wasn't drunk, but the whole scene reeks of alcohol fumes.

Street Fighter: The Movie 'Guile's Speech' clip


The Mortal Kombat movie was smart enough to stick to self-parody all the way through. I really wonder if the Street Fighter movie would have been more tolerable if it had skipped the Freedom: Serious Business schtick. Maybe de Souza could have taken that over the top as well, with Guile flinging Crying Eagle 9/11 collector's plates instead of Sonic Booms.

Related Links:

Where On The Planet is the Lost Planet Movie?
Games to Film: Street Fighter: The Legend fo Chun-Li Looks...Good?
Trailer Review: Wanted

+ DIGG + DEL.ICIO.US + REDDIT

Comments

AlexB said:

Hmm. I never considered the Mortal Kombat movie to be self-parody. Maybe the second film.

Why exactly was Guile such an important character, anyway?

February 9, 2009 9:38 PM

Amber Ahlborn said:

AlexB, because he was the All 'merican Guy, which is the only appropriate focus for a 'merican audience.  Can't have none of them foreigners takin' the spotlight.  

In other news, what about the Street Fighter game based on the movie based on the game?

February 9, 2009 10:50 PM

LBD "Nytetrayn" said:

AlexB> I guess they figured he was the all-American with a more interesting story.

The big question is which will be the better GI Joe movie: This, or Rise of Cobra.

February 10, 2009 12:16 AM

AlexB said:

Ahaha. They want an American character to star, so in a move of pure genius they cast him as a man with an incomprehensibly thick Belgian accent.

Not that I mind. It just bumps the ridiculous up enough so that I can watch the movie.

I haven't seen the movie since the late nineties, and watching the clips online made me realize that man, Raul Julia can make most anything sound good. He's been in a few horrible, horrible movies and he doesn't half-ass them the way, say, Dennis Hopper would.

February 10, 2009 8:50 AM

LBD "Nytetrayn" said:

In fairness to the people who made the movie, I seem to remember a lot of fans thinking Van Damme would be perfect for the role of Guile...

...that is, until they actually saw it.

And yes, Raul Julia made this movie great.

February 10, 2009 4:20 PM

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John Constantine, our superhero, was raised by birds and then attended Penn State University. He is currently working on a novel about a fictional city that exists only in his mind. John has an astonishingly extensive knowledge of Scientology. Ultimately he would like to learn how to effectively use his brain. He continues to keep Wu-Tang's secret to himself.

Derrick Sanskrit is a self-professed geek in a variety of fields including typography, graphic design, comic books, music and cartoons. As a professional hipster graphic designer, his recent clients have included Hooksexup, Pitchfork and MoCCA, among others.

Amber Ahlborn - artist, writer, gamer and DigiPen survivor, she maintains a day job as a graphic artist. By night Amber moonlights as a professional Metroid Fanatic and keeps a metal suit in the closet just in case. Has lived in the state of Washington and insists that it really doesn't rain as much as everyone says it does.

Nadia Oxford is a housekeeping robot who was refurbished into a warrior when the world's need for justice was great. Now that the galaxy is at peace (give or take a conflict here or there), she works as a freelance writer for various sites and magazines. Based in Toronto, Nadia prizes the certificate from the Ministry of Health declaring her tick and rabies-free.

Bob Mackey is a grad student, writer, and cyborg, who uses the powerful girl-repelling nanomachines mad science grafted onto his body to allocate time towards interests of the nerd persuasion. He believes that complaining about things on the Internet is akin to the fine art of wine tasting, but with more spitting into buckets.

Joe Keiser has a programming degree from Johns Hopkins University, a tiny apartment in Brooklyn, and a fake toy guitar built in the hollowed-out shell of a real guitar. He writes about games and technology for a variety of outlets. One day he will stop doing this. The day after that, police will find his body under a collapsed pile of (formerly neatly alphabetized) collector's edition tchotchkes.

Cole Stryker is an American freelance writer living in York, England, where he resides with his archeologist wife. He writes for a travel company by day and argues about pop culture on the internet by night. Find him writing regularly here and here.

Peter Smith is like the lead character of Irwin Shaw's The 80-Yard Run, except less athletic. He considers himself very lucky to have this job. But it's a little premature to take "jack-off of all trades" off his resume. Besides writing, travelling, and painting houses, Pete plays guitar in a rock trio called The Aye-Ayes. He calls them a 'power pop' band, but they generally sound more like Motorhead on a drinking binge.


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