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Why the Wii's Hardware Sucks

Posted by Bob Mackey

All three of the current-gen console systems have their drawbacks, but the Wii seems to be the most underpowered--and I'm not talking about graphics, here. From its clunky digital marketplace to the unfortunate lack of storage space (a man cannot live on 512 megs alone), there's a lot about the Wii that could be changed for the better--but, since they're still selling like crazy regardless of any issues, improving the Wii isn't exactly a priority for Nintendo.

I at first assumed the Wii's issues were fixable and temporary--until I was broken out of my state of blissful ignorance thanks to a post over at hackmii.com. A blogger who goes by the hacker alias "marcan" recently wrote a lengthy and eye-opening diatribe about the general lousiness of the Wii's hardware. Marcan's rant is a little mired in technical terms, but his points are clear even without any knowledge of the jargon.

Go here to read the post, and feel free to report back here with your reactions. Do you think Nintendo is going one day release a Wii 2 to solve some of these problems?

Related Links:

Two Years In: The Wii's Feats of Strength and Its Disappointments
What Do You Want from the "Wii HD?"
On Sega and the Proper Use of the Wii in 2009


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Comments

John said:

None of this is particularly surprising or stuff we didn't already know. Nintendo has been using this design theory since the beginning and must have assumed that it would keep working. The advantages of a system like the Xbox or PS3 have obviously aren't of interest to them. Maybe they will be in the future, but I doubt Nintendo even cares at the moment. They've obviously designed the Wii specifically to be the way it is and, even if their reasons are crazy, they have reasons for it.

March 5, 2009 4:39 PM

LBD "Nytetrayn" said:

I figure we might see something new when sales slow.  Maybe even something that plays DVDs or has HD output.

March 6, 2009 12:38 AM

weirdbeard said:

laf.

yeah, nytetrayn... you're right.  inability to play DVD's is really a big obstacle to adoption, here in late 1999... wait...

no

who doesn't have a dvd player? honestly?

and who would *actually* want to use their wii as a DVD player?

March 8, 2009 3:35 AM

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About Bob Mackey

For a brief period of time I was Bull from TV's Night Court, but some of you may know me from the humor column I wrote for Youngstown State University's The Jambar, Kent State University's The Stater, and Youngstown's alternative newspaper, The Walruss. I'm perhaps most well-known for my bi-weekly pieces on Something Awful. I've also blogged for Valley24.com and have written articles for EGM, 1UP, GameSpite and Cracked. For all of my writing over the years, I have made a total of twenty American dollars. It's also said that I draw cartoons, which people have described with words such as "legible." I kidnapped the Lindbergh Baby and am looking to do so again in the future.

If unsatisfied, please return unused portion for partial refund.

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John Constantine, our superhero, was raised by birds and then attended Penn State University. He is currently working on a novel about a fictional city that exists only in his mind. John has an astonishingly extensive knowledge of Scientology. Ultimately he would like to learn how to effectively use his brain. He continues to keep Wu-Tang's secret to himself.

Derrick Sanskrit is a self-professed geek in a variety of fields including typography, graphic design, comic books, music and cartoons. As a professional hipster graphic designer, his recent clients have included Hooksexup, Pitchfork and MoCCA, among others.

Amber Ahlborn - artist, writer, gamer and DigiPen survivor, she maintains a day job as a graphic artist. By night Amber moonlights as a professional Metroid Fanatic and keeps a metal suit in the closet just in case. Has lived in the state of Washington and insists that it really doesn't rain as much as everyone says it does.

Nadia Oxford is a housekeeping robot who was refurbished into a warrior when the world's need for justice was great. Now that the galaxy is at peace (give or take a conflict here or there), she works as a freelance writer for various sites and magazines. Based in Toronto, Nadia prizes the certificate from the Ministry of Health declaring her tick and rabies-free.

Bob Mackey is a grad student, writer, and cyborg, who uses the powerful girl-repelling nanomachines mad science grafted onto his body to allocate time towards interests of the nerd persuasion. He believes that complaining about things on the Internet is akin to the fine art of wine tasting, but with more spitting into buckets.

Joe Keiser has a programming degree from Johns Hopkins University, a tiny apartment in Brooklyn, and a fake toy guitar built in the hollowed-out shell of a real guitar. He writes about games and technology for a variety of outlets. One day he will stop doing this. The day after that, police will find his body under a collapsed pile of (formerly neatly alphabetized) collector's edition tchotchkes.

Cole Stryker is an American freelance writer living in York, England, where he resides with his archeologist wife. He writes for a travel company by day and argues about pop culture on the internet by night. Find him writing regularly here and here.

Peter Smith is like the lead character of Irwin Shaw's The 80-Yard Run, except less athletic. He considers himself very lucky to have this job. But it's a little premature to take "jack-off of all trades" off his resume. Besides writing, travelling, and painting houses, Pete plays guitar in a rock trio called The Aye-Ayes. He calls them a 'power pop' band, but they generally sound more like Motorhead on a drinking binge.


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