Posted by Bob Mackey
That's right. Back when I had a brief anime phase in college, which mysteriously coincided with a long sexual drought, I had strictly non-sexual fantasies of a Final Fantasy VI anime. Two reasons: A.) Final Fantasy Unlimited was so bad that not even Japan wanted to see more of it, and B.) Final Fantasy VI's epic, operatic storyline that actually made sense (an important distinction) seemed perfectly tailored for serialized, animated fiction.
Unfortunately, Square's forays into the world of non-interactive entertainment have been affronts to even the unholy god who allowed them to exist in this world to prolong the suffering of mankind. Thank whatever applicable deity for obsessed Japanese fans, who have the spirit and free time I lack to make my own dreams come true.
Yes, it's essentially Full Metal Alchemist characters cosplaying as Final Fantasy VI characters and rotoscoped over previously-existing animation, but--damn it--a man can dream. Am I the only out there with such a far-off, adaptation-based wish? (This is where you respond and I feel better.)
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About Bob Mackey
For a brief period of time I was Bull from TV's
Night Court, but some of you may know me from the humor column I wrote for Youngstown State University's The Jambar, Kent State University's The Stater, and Youngstown's alternative newspaper, The Walruss. I'm perhaps most well-known for my bi-weekly pieces on Something Awful. I've also blogged for Valley24.com and have written articles for EGM, 1UP, GameSpite and Cracked. For all of my writing over the years, I have made a total of twenty American dollars. It's also said that I draw cartoons, which people have described with words such as "legible." I kidnapped the Lindbergh Baby and am looking to do so again in the future.
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