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FMV Hell: Mega Man X4

Posted by Nadia Oxford

Let us board our DeLorean and travel back to 1997. Gaming was going through a massive transition, as was American culture in general. We were still excited about anime and wanted nothing more than to lick rigid Playstation cutscenes up and down.

We pressed our noses longingly against the panes of computer shops that ran the Mega Man X4 intro over and over. We said "Ohhhh!" Now we say, "Ohhhh," as in, "Oh God, my eyes feel like moles are scratching them."

I'm not even referencing Mega Man X4's awful English voice acting. I don't need to. The low quality of the anime stands by itself, like a putrid pair of underwear.



Maybe it's not the worst thing to crawl out of the FMV Hell pit, but it's definitely reeky budget anime. The stiff movements, the lack of backgrounds--

Okay, Sigma and Zero tearing shit up was pretty cool, if not speared by a few too many speedlines.



The quality of the voice acting in Mega Man X games improved as years went on, but Sigma only stopped sounding like Oscar the Grouch by Maverick Hunter X. Which, by the way, contains an OAV that's far less repulsive than Mega Man X4's cutscenes. Alas, it is entirely too short.

I guess I should appreciate game history for what it is now...but I wonder how much it would have cost the animation team to colour in X and Zero's eyes.

Related Links:

FMV Hell: Star Studded Casts: Do You Give a Crap?
FMV Hell: Sonic CD
FMV Hell: Lunar, the Silver Star


+ DIGG + DEL.ICIO.US + REDDIT

Comments

Roto13 said:

Oh, I don't think the animation was all that bad for when it was made. (Though not great by any means.) The voice acting is definitely worse than the animation, though. Why the hell does X sound like standard Mega Man?

October 24, 2008 9:12 PM

Demaar said:

Yeah, still waiting on that reasonably budgeted MM anime of some descript. I know it'll be a long wait, but meh.

October 25, 2008 2:16 PM

Roto13 said:

Sign me up!

October 25, 2008 10:49 PM

Nadia Oxford said:

Man, I hear they chain you to a wall and feed you gruel.

October 26, 2008 1:48 AM

Roto13 said:

As long as my thumbs are free for all those sweet free games I'll get to play.

October 26, 2008 1:36 PM

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about the blogger

John Constantine, our superhero, was raised by birds and then attended Penn State University. He is currently working on a novel about a fictional city that exists only in his mind. John has an astonishingly extensive knowledge of Scientology. Ultimately he would like to learn how to effectively use his brain. He continues to keep Wu-Tang's secret to himself.

Derrick Sanskrit is a self-professed geek in a variety of fields including typography, graphic design, comic books, music and cartoons. As a professional hipster graphic designer, his recent clients have included Hooksexup, Pitchfork and MoCCA, among others.

Amber Ahlborn - artist, writer, gamer and DigiPen survivor, she maintains a day job as a graphic artist. By night Amber moonlights as a professional Metroid Fanatic and keeps a metal suit in the closet just in case. Has lived in the state of Washington and insists that it really doesn't rain as much as everyone says it does.

Nadia Oxford is a housekeeping robot who was refurbished into a warrior when the world's need for justice was great. Now that the galaxy is at peace (give or take a conflict here or there), she works as a freelance writer for various sites and magazines. Based in Toronto, Nadia prizes the certificate from the Ministry of Health declaring her tick and rabies-free.

Bob Mackey is a grad student, writer, and cyborg, who uses the powerful girl-repelling nanomachines mad science grafted onto his body to allocate time towards interests of the nerd persuasion. He believes that complaining about things on the Internet is akin to the fine art of wine tasting, but with more spitting into buckets.

Joe Keiser has a programming degree from Johns Hopkins University, a tiny apartment in Brooklyn, and a fake toy guitar built in the hollowed-out shell of a real guitar. He writes about games and technology for a variety of outlets. One day he will stop doing this. The day after that, police will find his body under a collapsed pile of (formerly neatly alphabetized) collector's edition tchotchkes.

Cole Stryker is an American freelance writer living in York, England, where he resides with his archeologist wife. He writes for a travel company by day and argues about pop culture on the internet by night. Find him writing regularly here and here.

Peter Smith is like the lead character of Irwin Shaw's The 80-Yard Run, except less athletic. He considers himself very lucky to have this job. But it's a little premature to take "jack-off of all trades" off his resume. Besides writing, travelling, and painting houses, Pete plays guitar in a rock trio called The Aye-Ayes. He calls them a 'power pop' band, but they generally sound more like Motorhead on a drinking binge.


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