Posted by Bob Mackey
Even though video games invade nearly every part of my life, they're rarely found wrapped around my body. Okay, there was this brief three-year period in my life--roughly around the time I worked at GameStop--where I wore nothing but promotional t-shirts and blue jeans, but at some point I realized that oversized Eternal Darkness gear wasn't exactly winning over the ladies. So I promptly gave away all of my video-game wear and vowed to never return until someone, somewhere could make nerdy clothes that weren't entirely so... nerdy.
Most video-game related shirts are of the variety you see in that image up above: they're usually a piece of clip art paired up with some sort of sassy expression--because your t-shirt's wit level is a good indication of your own. The problem with these goony shirts is that most of us adults have outgrown the witty banter of fourth-grade wordplay and Scarface references (yes, really) in exchange for becoming adults with some sort of taste in fashion. Note: if you're reading this and are currently wearing a black t-shirt with a smart-alecky slogan printed in white text about how you won't fix my computer or something, I expect a written apology sent to my inbox.
In an exciting twist to this fashion-related adventure, my five-year boycott of video game apparel ending this October when I discovered FanGamer. It should be noted that the fact that they sell Earthbound merchandise probably means I would have fallen in love with them regardless, but their shirts are actually fashionable, high-quality, and reassuring to those who fear they will be beaten for wearing clothing based on a 1995 Super Nintendo RPG. I think the main difference between their shirts and the mass-market shirts--aside from all of the love involved--is that FanGamer is working within the constraints of copyright violation; so, their representations of what they're trying to represent has to be abstracted some way to avoid legal troubles. This situation leads to shirts that are both clever to fans and tolerable to the outside world, which is quite a feat. No one quite knows what the pins on my jacket or the "EB" on my t-shirt stands for--and if they ask, they get more information than they wanted to know.
So, have any of you out there discovered some great video game gear? I'm looking to expand my summer wardrobe.
Related Links:
The Mother 3 Strategy Guide: Fandom Done Right
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About Bob Mackey
For a brief period of time I was Bull from TV's
Night Court, but some of you may know me from the humor column I wrote for Youngstown State University's The Jambar, Kent State University's The Stater, and Youngstown's alternative newspaper, The Walruss. I'm perhaps most well-known for my bi-weekly pieces on Something Awful. I've also blogged for Valley24.com and have written articles for EGM, 1UP, GameSpite and Cracked. For all of my writing over the years, I have made a total of twenty American dollars. It's also said that I draw cartoons, which people have described with words such as "legible." I kidnapped the Lindbergh Baby and am looking to do so again in the future.
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