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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
Screw the big-budget blockbusters, you say? (Don't listen to them, Iron Man!) Well then, check out the latest indie films, and which ones you should Netflix/stand in line for, should they ever hit the wide-release screens. Screengrab reports from Tribeca with the latest and greatest:
Baghead, which “opens with a fairly vicious parody of a half-assed “mumblecore’-style independent film that looks as if the print had been delivered to the projection room in a cinnamon roll box with the icing still stuck to the insides.” (Mmm, cinnamon rolls…)
From Within, “a good, nasty little horror picture about a mysterious rash of apparent suicides in a small town setting.”
Bill Plympton’s latest animated offering, Idiots & Angels.
Playing, “Brazilian filmmaker Eduardo Coutinho's documentary that sounds like a dumb stunt but plays as a fascinating study in the nature of acting and storytelling.”
Theater of War, of which the “prime attraction is supposed to be the chance to see the Public Theater production coming together and to see a glimpse of the ‘process’ of its star, Meryl Streep.”My Winnipeg, in which director Guy Maddin, “eager to get at the roots of his unresolved childhood issues, decides to move back in with Mom and use some of the film budget to hire actors and a dog to ‘play’ his siblings and his ‘long, long, long-dead Chihuahua.’”
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
Scanner Nicole Pasulka writes, “So by now you’ve heard the news: With a few snaps of the camera, Miley Cyrus has crashed down to Earth and shattered our (totally pathetic) hope that she would be a tween entertainment act to escape the scandal that comes with fame at a young age.
Miley’s fall from teenage asexual grace seems like the perfect time to flash back to other kiddie song and dance acts who, while entertaining, have made us feel sort of uncomfortable. With Miley coming in at number 10, we move on to the next 9 pop stars too young to drive but old enough to have their lives ruined.
9. Kriss Kross. Jump! Jump! Then turn your pants around and go home for dinner, your mom’s calling you.”
Check out all ten (not in that way) right here.
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
Remember when Ally Sheedy was best known for her heavy bangs in The Breakfast Club? She disappeared for years, but came back with a hot, highbrow bang in High Art…
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
Do you ever find yourself in this situation?
Dear Miss Information,
I'm a bisexual girl who badly needs pornography. I need to find out how to get it without having to pay for it or contracting nasty diseases on my computer. Finding pictures and videos of penises entering vaginas is easy, but finding hot girl-on-girl stuff is really hard. My definition of hot girl-on-girl does not include tweaked-out bleached-blonde leather-skinned skinny girls sucking on dildos or looking at the camera while fingering each other with talon-like nails. Call me naive, but is there any porn or soft porn where the girls might legitimately appear attracted to other girls? I've tried to talk to male friends who know the ins and outs (so to speak) of porn, but their eyes just sort of glaze over and we end up watching the girl-on-girl I described above. Please help! — Really Need Real XXX
Where to find “real porn”? Check out Miss Info’s answers to this, and so much more, in this week’s titillating, totally real column.
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
It’s Ben & Jerry’s annual Free Cone Day! Yes, that’s right, it’s exactly as it sounds…you go to Ben & Jerry’s, you get a free ice cream cone. I’ve never gone, because (foolishly!) I thought the lines would take forever. But now half the Hooksexup staff has returned, happily doing some post-cone finger-licking, and explaining that the lines aren’t that long because, dammit, the B&J staff are efficient.
Color me jealous. The only thing I can do is spread the word (you have until 8 p.m. tonight!) and share this little Indian flick with a nice ice cream sex scene…
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
Today's online comics break brought to you by fearless intern Caitlin MacRae:
I like to take mini-breaks instead of big ones. I find them to be a much more satisfying way to ignore my responsibilities – a lunch break is mandated by law, but a five minute spaz fest on the computer in between projects? It feels sneakier, more subversive – and thus much, much more gratifying...
Law & Order: SVU Valentines, Achewood and more, after the jump!
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
Ooh, it’s a world premiere! Here’s the first glimpse we have of Scarlett Johannson, as Singer and Music Video Star. The song is “Falling Down” from her debut album, Anywhere I Lay My Head. Looks like she’s trying to send a message. Check the video after the jump...
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
Good virginal gods: everyone is all abuzz and atwitter about Annie Leibovitz’ “scandalous” Vanity Fair photos of Miley Cyrus, aka Hannah Montana. She looks naked! She looks like a vampire! She’s wrapped in expensive cloth, or a paper napkin—no one is quite sure! And then there are the lounging, cover-of-a-romance-novel shots with Miley and her father, Billy Ray Cyrus. No one’s been this disturbed since he mulleted his way to stardom with “Achy Breaky Heart.”
But why isn’t anyone throwing a teenaged tizzy fit over the recent NYMag cover, featuring the Gossip Girl cast lounging in a post-orgy-like photo session? Taylor Momsen (top left, on the cover) is a mere fourteen years old...
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
Oh, lying – whether you consider it an art form or just a weekend hobby, these little fictions make up a surprisingly large part of interpersonal communication. They’re accepted, they’ll never really have the chance to be questioned. I exist, comfortable in the knowledge that if I stretch. But when it comes to fabrications, you’re bound to be found out. I learned that lesson when I started wearing padded bras. Anatomy is a hard lie to fake – you can finagle your way around it, keep the lights low and the hands strategically placed, but sooner or later, my lack of boobage always came to light – I mean, really, who did I think I was kidding?
Craig Davidson, first man ever to lie about the length of his member, wrote this sly essay...
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
We love writer Rachel Shukert, and today we’re proud to publish this excerpt from her upcoming novel, Have You No Shame? Here, Rachel recounts her time spent in an out-patient clinic, being treated for anorexia. Of course, that’s not the entire story. My favorite line? “There was a demon in my vagina.”
Shukert was also kind enough to give us some behind-the-scenes thoughts on this piece. (“Dispersed throughout this harrowing depiction of erection-murdering events are helpful hints for the eating-disordered among you. Enjoy!")
I’ll turn it over to the divine, comedic genius of Ms. Rachel Shukert:
"Before developing the potentially lethal eating disorder, future sufferers of anorexia nervosa often display the tell-tale signs of susceptibility: a controlling nature, a desperate need to please, an uncompromising perfectionism in all things. As I am lazy, contrary, and easy on myself to the point of ludicrousness...
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
I admit: I was incredibly jealous when Hooksexup editor Will Doig told me he was going to interview Richard Price. I just recently discovered the joys of HBO’s The Wire (I know, I’m only a few years’ behind the times) and to sit and speak with one of the geniuses behind the scripts sounded like a dream come true…
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
As Scanner Emily says, ”When we were growing up, our mom always said 'just because we're poor doesn't mean we have to look poor.'" But over the last few years, we've noticed a new trend. Check out the Top Ten Rich People Who Look Poor. You might be surprised. Not by Nick Nolte, of course…but there are some good pics in there.
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Posted by Peter Smith
Need a little guidance? Look to our horoscopes:
Taurus (Apr. 20-May 20)
At the beginning of this week, Venus is going to ride all up into your Sun sign, naked on a clamshell, which is a fabulous portent for your romantic liaisons. But while you're busy shaking down the sexy folks you've got lined up, keep in mind how important it is to show yourself a little love now and then. You're not one to be bothered with aesthetic expectations, but a nice back rub or a bubble bath will do wonders for all that tension you've got stored up in your shoulders — not to mention your flexibility.
Not a Taurus? Find your sign here.
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
This list is impressive: how many top five sex-scene run-downs can include Jesus and Shakespeare as two of the key players? Sadly, not together…but still. Check out The Top Five Sex Scenes That Could Incite a Revolution. From Helena Bonham Carter to “Happy Harry Hard-On,” it will definitely incite a little somethin’ somethin’. Check out the fiery goodness; all part of Hooksexup’s Hollywood Sex Scene Database.
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
In this series, photographer Javier Carmona deftly walks the quivering tightrope between sex's two primary sensations: ecstasy and discomfort. Some of the discomfort is literal — a girl on a fireplace mantle struggles for balance against the counterweight of her own enormous boob. But other shots show a more internal distress that, for many of us, parallels the fireworks display of thoughts that occur during sex: ambivalence about our bodies, the unfamiliarity of intimate touch. It's as if he's read our minds. — Will Doig
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
Last week, Screengrab celebrated the 10 Sexiest Girl Geeks in Cinema...and now, in tribute to the return of that dreamy Professor Henry Jones, Jr. (in the hotly anticipated Kingdom of the Crystal Skull), the Screengrabbers present their equal-opportunity list of ten hot nerdy guys.
As with the previous list, most of these so-called nerds, geeks, dorks and maxi-zoom dweebies are played by actors who, in real life, are pretty easy on the eyes. But their characters, at least, are misfits and loners, undervalued diamonds in the rough just waiting to be discovered by some lucky, sharp-eyed lady (or gentleman).
Why lucky? Because as Robert Carradine’s Louis Skolnick says in Revenge of the Nerds (and as we at The Screengrab know oh so well): “Jocks only think about sports, nerds only think about sex.”
Watch ‘em in action, in Part 1 and Part 2.
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
Whom would you be more psyched to have a sex scene with: Christina Ricci or Justin Timberlake? I know, tough call…
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
You can tell a lot about a person from the choice of pet. Or their choice of said pet’s weaves:
9. Foxxy Cleopatra, Nicole Richie’s Pomeranian. Named after Beyonce’s character in Austin Powers, Foxxy Cleopatra and the also unfortunately named HoneyChild are often paraded around town wearing weaves and hairbows. Here’s hoping they haven’t felt displaced since Nicole squeezed the bun out of her oven.
Woof, woof: check out the Top Ten Celebrity Pets here.
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
Need some advice for getting medieval on someone’s ass? (I couldn’t resist; sorry.) Do chicks in horned Viking helmets get you hot? Either way, you’ll want to check out Dating Advice From…Medieval Historians:
I like to watch the History Channel, but the guy I'm dating just wants to watch things like Keeping Up With the Kardashians. I can't help but judge him for this. Does this make me a snob? How can I overcome this?
In regards to your question, "Am I a snob?" I'm going to respond with a resounding "yes." You need to bridge the gap — spend time watching both sets of your programs together and addressing both the positive and negative qualities in them. You can rip apart My Super Sweet Sixteen, but also contextualize the program as a response to the demands of hyper-consumptive, twenty-first century industrialized American society.
What's the best way to impress a medievalist?
Bust out some mad Latin skills.
Carpe diem, baby. See all their advice here
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Posted by Peter Smith
This week, Miss Info counsels a relationship-hungry reader who keeps falling for flighty women. She's got extensive tips on meeting ladies who're looking for more than a casual hookup.
* Go to non-boozy establishments to meet people. Even a house party is better, because it's a friend of a friend and there's some connection. * Start out not wanting to like the other person. Wait for them to give you a reason to like them. I don't recommend this for everyone, but in this case a negative bias is therapeutic.
* Read other people's online profiles carefully. Pay special attention to relationship status, location, age and kind of relationship desired.
Check out all her tips — and a fun question about period sex — here.
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
Have you been to Party Mountain? I bet you haven’t, but you should go….
Young Bob Dylan put a free fro yo machine on Party Mountain,
but the cast of Superbad can’t have any.
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
We all know good dental hygiene is of the utmost importance. But Hooksexup photoblogger Autumn and her gorgeous friend Miss Erikitty take the nightly teeth-brushing ritual to a whole, new, delicious level. See their homemade video after the jump…
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
Now this would be a tough “Who Would You Rather?”: Tina Fey versus Amy Poehler. I’m not even going to try to decide; it would rip my mind in two. Lucky editor Gwynne Watkins didn’t have to choose, however. Over at our lil’ sister site, Babble, she got to interview both funny women: Can you talk about the first time you met and what you thought of each other? Was your chemistry instant, or has it evolved over the years?
Amy: I was like, I finally found the woman I want to marry.
Tina: And then I had to break it to her that that's not legal.
Check out the full interview here. And, do you like to hear real women talk about stuffing their faces? (With food, yo.) Of course you do. Here are Amy and Tina, talking food and smack with each other…
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
Yesterday, Caitlin MacRae, fearless Hooksexup intern and gal who’s had more threesomes than actual dates, was searching for her power animal. (Aren’t we all?)
Me (3:33:07 PM): dude, what's your power animal? Her (3:33:23 PM): oh, it's a panda Her (3:33:50 PM): like me, they're rare, lazy, and enjoy snacking
Her (3:34:04 PM): but despite their slothful nature, cross them and they might eat your face Her (3:34:14 PM): also, my sneezes are hilarious
Of course, modern technology has figured out a way to skip shamanic vision quests and soul-searching. Now all you need to find your power animal is...
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
McSteamy, McDreamy…and “Ass Boy”? The latter may not be coming to Grey’s Anatomy anytime soon, but things are definitely steamy and dreamy in the Hooksexup Dating Confessions. Share your pet names with the world, right here.
Also, can you believe how good Ellen Pompeo looks in this bathing suit?
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
Who are the earthiest photobloggers in the Hooksexup blogosphere? Honey child, you know it’s the down-home, delicious duo of Rose + Olive. Let’s venture beyond the Premium veil and see what those lovely, earthy goddesses are up to (and whom they’re getting down with)…
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Posted by Nicole Ankowski
Treehugger knows that environmental groups sometimes need to think outside the box in order to get attention, and this list highlights (shall we say) five ads which are definitely outside the box, and below the waist. Torchlights shining from your derrière? Alicia Silverstone, all hot and wet and naked?
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