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Sex Machine: The facial hair pubic hair conundrum

Posted by airheadgenius

Moustaches and Beards.
Friend or Foe?

 

He's short, but he's cute. Back then anyway...

I have a thing for beards. There. I've said it. Moustaches under very specific circumstances are hot too - like long Zapata ones styled to look corny, yet cool on some hip young thing. Stubble too. I love me some stubble.

But surely moustaches are dichotomous little buggers?

Ponder this for a minute if you would indulge me...

Q: Who likes moustaches the best?
A: Gay men

Q: What is a moustachioed mouth reminiscent of?
A: Snatch

Q: Who does not like snatch?
A: Gay men.

Tricky huh???
Now, pondering this a little further cos, let's face it, neither you nor I have anything better to do, here's the thing:

Straight men like snatch, so wouldn't it make sense that they also liked women with facial hair so that they could kiss a hairy orifice in public? (I know, not the most romantic of sentences, but what can yer do?) But straight men tend not to like women with facial hair.

Now, lesbians also like snatch. What's their stance on female facial hair? Any lesbian spokesperson willing to step forward?

And here's another thing that occurs to me. Moustaches were most fashionable back in the 70s and that was when public hair was *fashionable* too. Coincidence? I don't think so. Is that why men are now into Brazilian - supposedly - because they are no longer sporting beards themselves? (Yes Zeit dear, we know you are the exception. Well done. Pat on back)

OK people, please talk to me about snatch. I mean facial hair. Discuss, expand, compare and contrast. C'mon beautiful people, this is your chance to shine!

(This brought to you by "I can't help it if weird things occur to me dot com")

See, here's a sexy guy with facial hair. Robert Powell. Shame about the crown of thorns and crucifixion though - no, wait a minute, that was Jesus.



 

Here are some I made earlier:
The trouble with rich men
5 Things I am Thankful for
British Personal Ads
How do you like to be dumped?
Not much to do with dating
Duh!
Do you date aliens"
Man's Best Friend
How do you like your foreskin?
Why do men love breasts?
Who pays?
What if?
Have you ever been experienced?
Surprise! I'm Pregnant!
Dogs and Dating
Erectile Dysfunction
Daddy's Girl
I need a Frenchman
What I want
The Fart Edition
Fisting and small snatches
How bloggers date
Did he die?
Je t'adore
Zeitgeisty's Behaviour
+ DIGG + DEL.ICIO.US + REDDIT
Posted Nov 30 2008, 10:24 AM
Filed under: , , , , , , , , , ,

Comments

aliasmm said:

being a lesbean myself. i would say no no to facial hair. i like the ladies. tho i knew a girl one time who had a large amount of hair under her chin. not so much my type.

November 30, 2008 11:50 AM

recycledbrooklyn said:

So are you singing, Jesus is just all right with me?  

I started to ponder your conundrum, and then thought better of it.  There are some aspects of myself I'd rather not explore.  

November 30, 2008 11:57 AM

notabot said:

I've never given much thought to the moustache as snatch theory, but I do loves me a well put together moustache.   And I love snatch.  Make of that what you will.

November 30, 2008 2:47 PM

weirdbeard said:

I've had a beard sans 'stache for a few years now.  it seems to be a nice balance between the ruggedness of facial hair and not rubbing your lady-friend in the face/nethers with a bristly lip.

November 30, 2008 3:09 PM

Toluca_86 said:

The only facial hair I seem to like, generally, are goatees (but only on the right guys).  So what does that mean?

November 30, 2008 4:19 PM

Michael said:

I have always been clean shaven although I grew a 'motorcycle cop' moustache in the late 60s-early 70s. A girlfriend urged me to grow a full beard but after three months she disliked it. The moustache did attract some women who liked the ride in bed...it was a great margarita salt strainer for awhile in some San Diego bars. For me, no facial hair, no goatees, no soul patches under the lower lip and no hippy dippy sideburns.  

November 30, 2008 7:22 PM

tearsofacid said:

this is awesome! your logical hula-hoops amaze me : )

November 30, 2008 9:22 PM

zeitgeisty said:

hooksexup.com/.../15938_beard4.jpg

item.slide.com/.../GwJsN1tupwIgAPzlAAB9OjcB4_3YkYU7

November 30, 2008 9:42 PM

Hugonaut said:

Did you mean to type "public hair" instead of pubic hair?  Was that clever or a typo?  Be honest.

November 30, 2008 10:07 PM

airheadgenius said:

alias - I have one rogue chin hair that keeps coming back. Does that mean you wouldn't do me? It's my only one and I am otherwise reasonably smooth of chin.

recycled - I like that song a lot, except for all the religion in it. And did you just inadvertantly out yerself?

nota - is that really you??? Coming across the great divide? I am humbled and honoured.

weird - it certainly worked for Lincoln. I do hope for your girlfriend's sake that your top lip is a tad fuller though.

November 30, 2008 10:18 PM

airheadgenius said:

Toluca - you are a lesbian with a penchant for elaborately coiffured snatch??? Buggered if I know.

Michael - I like a man with strong opinions. Thanks for sharing.

tears - glad to amuse. At least I think I've amused you.

zeit - oh lordy, what are you up to... best go see

November 30, 2008 10:21 PM

airheadgenius said:

zeit - I clicked on the first one and then the second one with much trepidation. I fully expected to be met with a close up of a hairy James Hunt. Not sure whether to be relieved or disappointed.

hugo - I'd love to say clever, but alas a typo. No cleverness here, rest assured.

On a totally unrelated note, if anyone has an explanation as to why my 5 year old is whispering to himself at 10.30pm, I'd love to hear it. In the interim, I am off to lambast the little fecker. (hugo, that was deliberate and not a typo which I prefer to be called spelling mistake, but it's not important)

November 30, 2008 10:26 PM

Thea said:

Of course mouth equals snatch! That's why we wear lip gloss!

December 1, 2008 2:30 AM

zeitgeisty said:

I suppose compared to a hairy james hunt, I am a bit of a disappointment...

December 1, 2008 9:59 AM

shakti_vos said:

hey! i have a rogue chin hair, too, i call it my beard, then i pluck it right off with the tweezers.

i don't like facial hair on men.  i have very sensitive skin and it rips me up, especially in the winter when it's really dry.  i also wax my snatch, and that's so not for the little girl fetishists i date (do i date little girl fetishists?), it's really because i can't stand it. for someone who has very little hair on her legs and arms, my pubes are shockingly dense. and, as someone who's been on both ends of cunnilingus, i prefer less hair.  

December 1, 2008 1:40 PM

zeitgeisty said:

when will you women realize that shockingly dense is a POSITIVE thing!

December 1, 2008 4:02 PM

zeitgeisty said:

uh... when it comes to snatch and under-arm hair that is.

December 1, 2008 4:21 PM

rinaldi said:

hair is really just hair no matter where it is right? zeit can lick a hairy mop but I want to touch, taste and feel skin against skin..... and that doesn't mean shaved is the only way to go, trim can be just as nice as long as there is more skin than hair. I am pretty much a perpetual 5 oclock shadow guy but I am all for getting my face nice and smooth as prep for going down on my girl's tenderest parts..... and i love it when her tender bits are all nice and smooth for me. that pedophilia shit about shaved snatches is just a line for those who can't be bothered with a little personal maintenance...skin is so much better than hair

December 1, 2008 6:23 PM

airheadgenius said:

Thea - that much is a given. But it doesn't explain why we don't wear moustaches.

zeit - yes you are

shakti - now I know everything about you. Let's grow out our one beard hair and do a Coney Island double act.

I like no/little hair for cunnilingus purposes and hair for aesthetic purposes, so a partially doctored punani is my choice.

zeit - when will you realise that you are going against the culturally accepted grain? Don't ever change though. Wait, scratch that. Change quite a bit, but not that bit.

zeit 2 - I am tempted to argue that most men like their women shockingly dense.

rinaldi - I take it you don't have girl children.

December 1, 2008 6:57 PM

rinaldi said:

no girl children, two boys. just reread shakti's comment too (little girl fetishists?) I think you've hit it, the partial doctoring is perfect. and stay way away from those with an interest in little girls or dense women.

December 1, 2008 8:25 PM

Mahrya said:

I wax my nether-regions, leaving a respectable patch of womanhood up top. I agree with the skin-on-skin statements. I don't wax for my partners, I wax for me and the wonderful feeling of a tongue grazing my labia sans hair.

December 2, 2008 12:40 AM

notabot said:

It is really me.  I even grew a beard in honour of this post.

December 2, 2008 1:29 PM

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