Sometimes I have the impression women are genetically programed to start demanding more passion and romantic gestures once a certain level of domesticity sets in. And somehow, demanding it directly never seems to bring the desired results. A pity, I guess. Keeping passion alive might be possible, but you need to play some innocent tricks constantly, even if that sounds totally annoying. From what you write, I'm given the feeling it is more your girl making the "more passion/attention complaining" than you, who seem comfortable and secure enough in order to just watch the TV around her sweet hot presence.

Consequently, she might wanna try playing some tricks with you, because eventually, it is her wanting something to change, to increase her own pleasure next to you. Best would be to visit those museums and have those dinners with friends or strangers she finds interesting and leave you out of the picture for a little while. Following such sophisticated logistics, it shouldn't take you too long to realize what a cutie pie she is and start some sort of "inside-the-relationship-chasing". ;)

I find it most difficult in any romance to handle the closeness/distance dynamics. Closeness gives security, distance creates attraction. Some women/men are born with the skills to perfectly offer both things on the menu, others have to learn it...

But this is just an opinion, so yeah...

Ok, interesting. So she insists doing those things together with you...Your girl could be very much in love with you and craving for more affection, since honestly, demanding "doing things together" is just a rational excuse masking perhaps more delicate heart demands, who knows, I don't want to speculate too much.

But one thing is sure: complaining more won't bring any good results. She informed you already about her level of satisfaction, so she stood by herself, you know it, now she has to get pleasure from other sources and things will definitely become more productive, in whatever sense :)

Vintage Wynona. Yes please.

Sadly, I have no advice for you about your girlfriend. What I can tell you all about is monkeys. You may want to reconsider your characterization of Rhesus macaques. The females mate with multiple males during any given fertile period and the groups are female-dominated. So, I don't think it's a good comparison to young love. They're not possessive, not clingy, certainly not monogamous, and they don't even know who their baby daddy is. In fact, they mate with many males specifically in order to obscure the paternity of their children so that they'll have protection/help from more group members.

OK, I'm done being a nerdy primatology student now.

OK, well maybe they are clinging in that picture. But normally... cold ass bitches.

As the queen of engagements, I am familiar with your plight.  My tactic has been:  the chase, enchantment, burgeoning love, the huge diamond, a momentary cozy security, and then a wild bolt the first time the long underwear and remote become routine.  Luckily, age is softening my expectations.  I am still cute, but less kinetically extraordinary.  I am still enthusiastic, but less explosively alive.  Normalcy has tapped me on the shoulder, and instead of running from it, I have tried flirting with the idea.  My fiance has pressed a wedding date and while I haven't officially acknowledged it, a vintage gown has smuggled itself into my closet.  Each night we sit before MSNBC and I talk back to Chris Mathews like a cantankerous old friend.  I "get you" but hope you can put aside your misanthrope for love. A drink with friends, a trip to the museum, and a crap movie may seem insufferable, but imagine your most isolated nights as these words are screamed at you:  "YOU'RE WATCHING HARDBALL!"  

What if you told her you'd rather stay home and have filthy perverted sex than go to a museum? I often want to go out and do cultural or social things with my sweetheart, but we always just seem to end up fucking instead. I don't feel cheated. Just a thought.

So... no sympathy from the female bloggers, Z!

I feel you on this one, the complete lack of motivation to do anything, even when it comes to loved ones, making money, and generally 'living'. It's unhealthy though, for you and your relationships. Maybe if the girlfriend knew how you were operating on this one, she might be into finding something that really excites you as a way to spend time together. The dirty dirty sex as mentioned earlier. If she wants to go out... dirty dirty sex in public.

It's definitely a matter of motivation, and motivation tends to happen when you're excited by the pay off. Why aren't you excited about the pay off of making your girlfriend happy? Just general thoughts I guess...

I've said "no" a lot in my life (when sensing my girlfriend of the moment would put up with it), and I'm interested in what it'd be like to say "yes" more often.  Too bad that Jim Carrey holiday movie is going to make it feel too damn corney to have that as a goal.  

How was your election night, Z?

For minutes at a time, I was a less cynical person.

Mr. Z:  My fiance agrees with you!  He admitted half the things he does with me are in anticipation of returning to the couch.  

His words:  "I would never, of my own accord, attend a showing of 'Beverly Hills Chihuahua' but knowing you have a need to fawn over little dogs with huge eyes, I go, I enjoy your squealing, we come home, and then it's back on the couch...just you, me, and Lou Dobbs."  

I reminded him how much I hate Lou Dobbs and he said, "Right, but your angry Lou Dobbs impressions are the most relaxing part of my day."  I realize he is right.  I love smashing my face to make a fake double chin and screaming out weird conspiracy theories in a loud grandpa voice.  I wouldn't have imagined this to be an attractive quality.  You men are just odd.  

Since we're dirty talkin', Richard Wolfe and Chuck Todd seem like the sort of nice guys I should have paid more attention to in college.  Howard Fineman is sweet and absent-minded about his Just For Men Formula.  He has more important things to worry about than hair dye, like the economy.  I remain skeptical of vampire-fanged Chris Cilliza (sp?).  And Rachel Maddow is my bestest girlfriend, even though she will try to hit on me when drunk.  Monkey-mouth Gregory is an irritant, and I have mixed feelings about Keith Olberman.  I am equally repelled and attracted to his egomania.  My most hated:  Bill Falafel-Loofah O'Reily (and his horse-toothed body-language expert).  Watch how his eyes glitter at the most innocuous mention of anything titillating.   I read the transcripts of his sex calls and they were even worse than Bill Clinton's shenanigans in the Starr Report.  

One of my older relatives says that the most important thing to a successful long-term relationship is to have common interests, because at the end of the day, that's all you're going to have.  To that, I'd add that you need shared goals and values -- if you want different things in life or have conflicting beliefs, it's not going to work.  

I do agree that young love is different from older love, but I have to come out in favor of older love.  That bubbly feeling in your tummy at the start of a new, hot relationship isn't love; it's anxiety (about her, about you, about life, etc.).  Older love, although physical attraction and chemistry is a part of it, is about security -- the delight of having someone to come home to, or who comes home to you; the feeling that you have someone who is on your side, who has your back, and the responsibility of being the same for her.  I'm going to borrow AHG's armchair and suggest that, from what you're saying, it sounds like you want to be independent and have a girlfriend as a part of that independent existence.  Nothing wrong with that (been there, did that for years), but then don't kid yourself that you want a partnership.  You're still a sole proprietor who wants to set his own shop hours.  Don't be shocked, then, if your girlfriend takes her business elsewhere.