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Date Machine: ZEITGEISTY'S MONDAY AFTERNOON DATING CONFESSIONS SNARKY AND ASSININE RESPONSES...plus throbbage

Posted by zeitgeisty

Ok.. so many of you have had a problem with the name 'TRANSLATIONS', stating that I'm merely 'RESPONDING' in an assinine and snarky manner... Fair enough....I'll submit to that... This is why I'm hereby changing my Monday TRANSLATIONS.. to...



 

ZEITGEISTY'S MONDAY AFTERNOON DATING CONFESSIONS SNARKY AND ASSININE RESPONSES...



 

What it lacks in brevity, it makes up for in exactitude... So without further adieu.....

 



"Date Machine bloggers are getting boring. Replace them!"

 

Yeah… all except for that Zeitgeisty guy.. he’s way hot!

 

"None of my friends want me to so much as speak to you because you're an evil sadistic shit. They're not wrong, but let's be honest. They're all boring, and you make me wet when you talk about mathematics."



Ahhh.. yes…  Those mathematicians.. a greater bunch of evil sadists you're not likely to find!!.. You wanna bang the hottest broad in the room? Rattle off the Pythagorean theorem.. I tell you nothing makes the gals wetter than a mean, manipulative, mathematician.

 

"Thank you for finally telling me why you sometimes turn down my advances. Now I don't have to take it personally anymore!"



Herpes outbreak. 

"You dated me because a)you thought I was hot b) you thought dating a brainy, Jewish girl would make you smarter and c)but you still thought that I was young and innocent enough that you could be my daddy and dominate me, thus allowing you to control what you've always feared most--being shown up intellectually and having all your insecurities about your intelligence exposed by all the brainy girls you have ever resented/been obsessed with. Your psychology is embarrassingly obvious."



The woes of fucking Freud’s great, great , grand-daughter.

 

"To all you smart women out there: Men DO make passes at women who wear glasses! I , for one, am a sucker for super smart women. A smart, nerdy women really gets me going. Women nerds can be very sexy and very sexual. And the pillow talk is usually great! I am actually a pretty good looking guy, and sometimes find that nerdy women who I find really interesting don't trust me because of my looks, or don't think that I am serious (I am also pretty smart). I'm not complaining, but I just want to point out that many men do like smart women!"



Isn’t he a catch ladies? Don’t you wish you had a boyfriend just like him? Well gals, your prayers are answered! You can find his profile and many more just like it on the hottest new dating site to hit the web.. Douchenozzles.com

 

"Do I really need to show photos of myself in a bra to meet guys online?"



 Depends how big your tits are…

 

"You know what angers me the most? The fact that you're always the first person to appear on my profile page when I log in so that after we spend a whole wonderful night together and you fail to get in touch with me after, I can be pleasantly reminded that you are in fact pissing around online and it's not just that you're really busy or something. Thanks."

 

… and what praytell are you doing there? Shitting around? 

"I want to loose my gag reflex, or at least learn how to turn it off."

 

I suggest a marathon of Adam Sandler movies, to build up your immunity!

 

"I don't know if everyone wants equality, either though. On the extreme end, I think there's plenty of guys who just want his girl to be cute and enjoy shutting up and sucking his dick."

 

I tell all my hos to shut up whilst sucking my dick.. Don’t you know it’s not polite to talk with your mouthful?..

 

"I have avoided dating/hooking up with certain guys because I didn't like their names."

 

Hence the reason I dumped Analcunt Peterson.. the only man I’ll ever love…

"I sometimes get hit on by guys who're much shorter. I wonder what the sex would be like..."

 

 

 

 

Samantha Morton

 

My myspace  - - https://www.myspace.com/10separatecatch22s

My Facebook  - Zeit Geisty

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1632432989&ref=name

 

Blogger doodles

I wanna bang your friend

Show me your jugs

translations

Blogger doodles

Is there an expiration date on passion? 

translations 

bloggerdoodles 

 crazy pants

 used to be cool - zeitgeisty on MTV

hurting for a squirting - the female ejaculation file

 translations...

blogger doodles 3

the gardener and the rose

We fart therefore we are

TRANSLATIONS

 Blogger doodles 2

My most cringeworthy moments with women

Are you a sociopath part 2

Are you a sociopath part 1

translations...

 blogger doodles

The worst sex of my life

The sex and the city movie was lame

commitment phobia is a myth

Translations... 

TYPES

Do.. do women really suck in bed?

The odd disconnect between profile photos and reality

50 sexual expereiences I've never had

Dating COnfessions translations

 I'm a breast man... the JUGS file

John McCain makes my peepee go limp

Video blog - 'The word on the steet' - the nature of attraction.

My dating confessions TRANSLATIONS

My internet dating advice

What we want vs. What we need and the power balance between man and women

All Porn SUCKS!!

The night PAULINA and I discussed sex

How important are someone's politics when choosing a patrner?

 Hooksexup Confessions: It's all about the looks stupid!

Sex with someone I love - The MASTURBATION file

The Greatest Online Dating story - The PERSONALS file

'But baby I HAVE to put a profile up, it's required!!' - The GIRLFRIEND file

BITE ME! - Snark.

My first kiss...a remembrance of thing past

Feel the paste in you face - The FACIAL file

Talk dirty to me!!

I abstain! The fear to fuck

The unvarnished TRUTH about dating on the internet.

BITE ME!!!

Pontifications on the bangin' of ass - The ANAL file

The brass ring


+ DIGG + DEL.ICIO.US + REDDIT

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ABOUT THE BLOG

DATE MACHINE explores the triumphs and tragedies of your dating confessions. Look here for commentary, dating advice, and our own salacious (or ridiculous) dating stories.

OUR BLOGGERS

FishnetsAndLight

Professional Dominatrix, lapsed English major and token black chick extraordinaire. I'm also a great big perv. Bend over.

Location:New York, New York
Looking for: Those who aren't too afraid.

Zeitgeisty

I'm an existentialist trapped in the body of a rational humanist. I've got a penchant for misanthropy and a flair for the obvious. I'm quick with a joke or a light up your smoke, but there's someplace that I'd rather be. I'm Zeitgeisty, pleased to meet me I'm sure. Visit my blog at www.walruscomix.com/zeitgeisty.

Location: Somewhere on the isle of Manhattan...
Looking for: A shining good deed in a weary world...

Airheadgenius

I am a fish out of water - an opinionated cheeky smiling English chick in a land of larger than life Americans. I don't understand the culture. I don't understand asking if we're exclusive. I don't understand this weird practice of decapitating penises. Some days I am definitely MILF material. Other days I feel more like the material on the inside of yer grannys' handbag.

Location: Brooklyn
Looking for: A stunning socialist with a propensity to pick winning lottery numbers

amboabe

I'm a smart ass writer who'll argue your ear off, hold your hand close, and tell you the truth whenever. I'm a fool and a hero, a confessional soul, and lover of life in every conceivably absurd way that it can come. I also paint my toenails.

Location: San Francisco
Looking for: A sail, not an anchor.

spjv840

Slightly neurotic, over-analyzing girl..err, woman, with too much charm for the average person to handle. Has a fondness for red wine, cheap beer and a good time.

Location: The Igloo, Canada
Looking for: Nothing mediocre

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